“Whenever ‘love’ came into my life…” She used air quotes for the word love  ”It complicates everything” I speculated that she was insinuating that she had felt something similar to love before but it never worked out so she passed it off as a passing attraction.

“And all the woman you… date?” I could have been more crass but figured it wasn’t the time

“I never once have promised a single one anything than what it was and half of them only wanted that” she explained “Truthfully it gets lonely” it was a soft whispered and I highly doubt she wanted me to hear it so I brushed it off, even though it caused me to smile that she trusted me enough to be so open “I’m really not as bad as you’ve heard. A lot of the girls leave my bed happy and tell me how much fun they had then I show up somewhere and they have told all their friends that I was some monster to them”

“Maybe you should set them straight instead of letting everyone believe…”

“Porter, you think I’m a monster sometimes and why do you think that is? Because I let you believe what you wanna believe. I honestly don’t care what anyone thinks about me. I know the truth”

I silently applauded her for her strength and spoke up and asked… “One thing has been bugging me from the beginning”

“Your inability to stay awake after midnight?” she quipped, I see her sarcasm came back so shortly after letting me in slightly. It was refreshing. Our  friendship had shifted but we were still able to maintain that banter that I now enjoyed… Well enjoyed may be a little too adventurous when it came to her picking on every little thing I did.

“Your so not Funny… but really how can two people so different be such good friends?”

I watched her nod, understanding my question “I was a crap teenager, like really bad and Carly pulled me out of a lot of situations that really wasn’t her cross to bear but it was finally nice to know someone gave a crap about me because my parents would rather enjoy their separate holidays, affairs and well… the stock market”

“She’s amazing like that”