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    Unavoidable.

    Unavoidable.

     

    Tina:

     

    I felt my head throb as I tried to open my eyes, the puffiness of them preventing me to do more so then a small slit, through which I could see my surroundings…

     

    A sharp pain entered my head at the same moment as the first stream of light hit my eyes, causing me to squeeze them shut in an instant…

     

    But the short glance already had told me more than I’d wanted to know…

     

    I inhaled the scent, the scent I had once associated with my home… The scent I would always associate with my home. I felt the fabric of the couch beneath me, the couch on which I had spend so many evenings with her… Stroking her hair, feeling her cheek against my thigh, stealing an occasional kiss… This was the couch on which she had rubbed my feet when I had been pregnant for the first time, it was the couch on which she had slept after a fight. It was the couch on which we had sat, facing our friends, me with my fuzzy wuzzy slippers, as they had accused us of being boring… So boring…

     

    How much wouldn’t I give to be boring with her again…

     

    I felt my face wrench as a wave of nausea joined the increasing ache in my head…

     

    ‘God’

     

    I heard myself mumble, and was surprised at the hoarse and numb tone of my voice…

     

    How long ago had it been that I drunk so much that I felt like this?

     

    Again memories of this house overwhelmed me, the last time Id been in this compromising position I’d woken up in her arms… Was it the time that had faded the sensations or was it that, near to her, the feeling hadn’t been this bad?

     

    I tried, slowly, to get into a sitting position, my eyes still closed to prevent the dizziness to spread… And, I knew too well, too avoid looking at the painfully familiarity of the surroundings…

     

    I moaned as memories of the night before seemed to stream back in my head, filling it, rapidly. I felt the blanket, that had covered me, slide off, and felt the material of the shirt Shane had given me to wear scrape my hypersensitive skin.

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    Comments

    1. You did a beautiful job showing Tina’s thoughts and emotions bouncing back in forth between hope and despair. And then there is Bette waiting for Tina to wake up so she can tell her the truth.

    2. Awesome!Thanks for taking your time, as this was beautiful. Except for having no reason for OMFG2 and OMFG3 in last nights episode I would prefer it having worked out this way. Look forward to your next post.

    3. Doesn’t matter if this was late, it was wonderful to read. Your perspective is unique and helps fill in all those spaces we don’t get with IC. Thanks!

    4. Loved the chapter. You have given us the feelings and words from our girls that IC failed to give. Thanks so much for sharing your story with us. Love it. Please continue to post “afters” for us.

    5. Thank for taking time to post this story. I know that your time is limited so that makes the story even more amazing. I love how you bring out Tina’s emotions as she fights to not lose everything that is willing to come up as she finds her equilibrium.

    6. yea!!!!! you did it you did it! looking around… am i first? i think sooooo happy dancing!!! I think this story is so good, maybe IC should ask you to write some episode ;) just it will take a little ;) Good to read your post my friend and thanks so much for everything and your support during this hard time. Love ya

    7. Hey JustLoveB+T, How wonderful to read how Tina’s sleep-over could have played out. Bette does love Jodi but her connection to Tina is a force of nature. It is primeval and passionate. Good to see that Bette and Jodi realized this before Tina woke up. Now if only this had been the start of Episode 5-06. From your fingers to IC’s eyes. Love it. Please continue your wonderful way with wordds soon. Much joy and appreciation from Your Loyal Fan.

    8. Your stories are always so beautiful..**sigh**…I always smile when I see a new post from you! Let’s hope IC is taking notes!! Thank you for sharing your beautiful thoughts on how this could have played out on the show. Again, this was simply beautiful!

    9. Ohh yes – that was what we wantet in the first place – wish that would have happend in the episode – but us B & T fans have hope and we are stickint to it as well – it’s looks promising in season 5 so far ;O))) – post soon

    10. It shouldve went this way, but someone, I wont mention the name, was determined to have drama…damn tina looked like she wanted to pass out when Bette said she was in love with Jodi, Bette always could make Tina swoon

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