Fan Fiction
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Was it Time Wasted?
Story written on March 28, 2011 by Journey1962.
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“And one day about a year later my older sister and I were a women’s retreat and she let something slip that lead me to believe that she knew something had gone on between Bette and I. Some women were praying for her and she said crying “My sister is the way is because of me.” but that’s another story.” says Tina with little tears slowly filling her eyes. Bette gently rubs her back.
So sensing that Tina’s sister was not a topic for discussion today Alice moves on quickly. “So you two broke up to both date men?”
“No, it was so that I could date Kerwin. He was the first guy to ever pay me any attention. I wanted a chance at a normal life. What my family thought about me was very important even though I wasn’t very close to them their acceptance was still important to me back then. Also being with a man fit what I had always picture for my future.”
“So the thing with Bette was that just some bi-curious thing for you?”
“Yes and no. Yes, I was sexually curious not necessarily about being with a woman because I had never been with a guy before Bette. But Bette… with Bette I felt safe.”
“I think from talking to so many women over the years straight, lesbian or otherwise that their first sexually experiences were with other girls or women. Basically for those reasons that Tina and I became sexual with one another. There’s a level of intimacy that doesn‘t quite happen that same way with men and women. Women were are just wired differently. And it felt safe as Tina said.”
Alice decides to change direction a bit “So Bette how did you really handle Tina wanting to date?”
Bette took a little while to respond Tina caressed her hand with her thumb and Bette composed her thoughts. “I was utterly and completely devastated.” Bette takes and deep breathe and continues. “Oh my God. This is so stuck in my mind. I remember watching Tina get ready for her first date with Kerwin. I pretended to not be effected by it. But it really hit me hard as I watched him walk her to the car from the window of our apartment. She was out having fun, without me. She would be kissing someone else’s lips. And I sat home and cried my eyes out. That night, I tried to get drunk and I didn’t really drink back then. But in the apartment I had this cheap bottle of wine and I hated the taste but I wanted to get drunk so I mixed it with a can of Coca Cola.”
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It was courageous of you to share your story with us. Things happen in our lives for a reason and they help shape who we are now. I wish you happiness and peace.
This is my first time leaving a comment. I enjoyed your story. I related to some of this story. Here’s to a new chapter and may your journey be an amazing one!
Thanks for sharing the story and wisdom “…They were a time of learning and preparation for the good to come in your life…” :-) very touching and encouraging. Well, you might be shy as you said, and I really don’t know you, but I believe that you are a brave one ;-) proven by sharing this story and openly telling this is based on your experience. Wishing you happiness and love.. :-)
You were brave to share a part of yourself with us. I can so truly relate to your story. I am 44 years old, and I have known of my attraction to women since I was about eight years old, but has never been with a woman, lead the so call normal life for about 10 years from the age of 14-24 and then just left the whole scene alone and decided to just be alone,not fair to men and too much drama with women. Good Luck to you. And yes please an update on “Stripper”, I love that story.
I’m glad that a number of you can relate to this story in some way. I know a lot of us read for pure entertainment and to escape a little bit. But I also like to read to gain a little insight sometimes. As a shy person, I tend to be very introspect, too much in my head. As you can tell by the way that I write :) So one day when that special woman comes into my life I hope that I don’t over think things too much. :) Thanks for the well wishes. I am looking forward to loving again, the right person. Best wishes to those who search as well.
How brave you are. It takes an amazing person to see themselves as clear as you do. Best wishes on your journey to your true self…I hope you find more happiness along the way.
It takes some courage to write the way you have. I hope you feel better for it! Your handle makes a whole lot of sense now and I too wish you the very best on the journey you have embarked on :0)
I wish you happiness.Thank you for this story.
WOW, I LOVED THIS STORY! Thank you so much! x
I see myself in your story. Thank you for sharing and making me see the light.
What an excellent story and how brave you are. Thank you for sharing with us.
Glad to see your post and WoW! Such fortitude and insightful story, revealing too! Perception of God, faith and love is a cause of many struggles and debates; thank you for sharing a glimpse in your journey. Any way to have realization sooner rather than later is great! Please don’t take long to update the other story.
Got to the end of the story and realized I was crying. I could insert my name for Tina’s… 3 kids, a 19-year marriage ending after my ex cheated, and a similar “Bette” in my past. Thanks for sharing your experience and I agree with you about not regretting the past. From one shy, over-thinker to another, I wish you love and happiness on your journey. I hope you find someone
hey it was a beatiful story, and thank you for shering that with us, I hope that you find love again.
Thanks