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Was it Time Wasted?
Story written on March 28, 2011 by Journey1962.
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“No I didn’t stop loving Tina but I did have to let her go. It hurt too much to hold on. She had broken up with Kerwin because he…can I say this T? ” Tina nods yes “He cheated on her. All I could think was I would have never cheated on her. Shortly after they broke up I broke up with Samuel he and I were moving way too fast. It was a complete rebound relationship.”
“Was there sex involved?”
“Yes there was I think because I had already opened that door with Tina that it made it easier to be with someone else sexually. It didn‘t last long.”
“But no other women?”
“Not until much later after Tina and I stopped being room mates.”
“What stopped you two from rooming together.”
“I got married.” says Tina
“What?”
“Kerwin and I made up and we got married. I thought that I was in love with him. But actually I was in love with the idea of being married. I wanted to be married and have a family. I move on with the life that I thought that I wanted marriage and three children later and I wasn‘t happy. I always wanted children. And I love mine to death, but I spent most of my marriage depressed and lonely. I was married for nineteen years to someone who really didn‘t love me. The sad part is I knew what real love was because I had it with Bette. And I settled for the American norm.”
“So what caused the demise of your marriage?”
“Another woman.” says Tina
“Okay so I have to ask…on whose part?”
“On his. He decides that he wanted to be married, just not to me anymore. So a quick divorce and less than two months he was remarried.”
“Wow that was fast. Yes is was but that wasn’t the hardest part. We were quite active in church and he married my then Pastor’s daughter.
“Oh I am so sorry .”
“No need to be sorry. Yes it was a painful at the time but I am not at a loss really. I was miserable trying to ignore and suppress what I felt about women. And he wasn’t the greatest of husbands anyway. Extremely neglectful and unfaithful at times.”
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It was courageous of you to share your story with us. Things happen in our lives for a reason and they help shape who we are now. I wish you happiness and peace.
This is my first time leaving a comment. I enjoyed your story. I related to some of this story. Here’s to a new chapter and may your journey be an amazing one!
Thanks for sharing the story and wisdom “…They were a time of learning and preparation for the good to come in your life…” :-) very touching and encouraging. Well, you might be shy as you said, and I really don’t know you, but I believe that you are a brave one ;-) proven by sharing this story and openly telling this is based on your experience. Wishing you happiness and love.. :-)
You were brave to share a part of yourself with us. I can so truly relate to your story. I am 44 years old, and I have known of my attraction to women since I was about eight years old, but has never been with a woman, lead the so call normal life for about 10 years from the age of 14-24 and then just left the whole scene alone and decided to just be alone,not fair to men and too much drama with women. Good Luck to you. And yes please an update on “Stripper”, I love that story.
I’m glad that a number of you can relate to this story in some way. I know a lot of us read for pure entertainment and to escape a little bit. But I also like to read to gain a little insight sometimes. As a shy person, I tend to be very introspect, too much in my head. As you can tell by the way that I write :) So one day when that special woman comes into my life I hope that I don’t over think things too much. :) Thanks for the well wishes. I am looking forward to loving again, the right person. Best wishes to those who search as well.
How brave you are. It takes an amazing person to see themselves as clear as you do. Best wishes on your journey to your true self…I hope you find more happiness along the way.
It takes some courage to write the way you have. I hope you feel better for it! Your handle makes a whole lot of sense now and I too wish you the very best on the journey you have embarked on :0)
I wish you happiness.Thank you for this story.
WOW, I LOVED THIS STORY! Thank you so much! x
I see myself in your story. Thank you for sharing and making me see the light.
What an excellent story and how brave you are. Thank you for sharing with us.
Glad to see your post and WoW! Such fortitude and insightful story, revealing too! Perception of God, faith and love is a cause of many struggles and debates; thank you for sharing a glimpse in your journey. Any way to have realization sooner rather than later is great! Please don’t take long to update the other story.
Got to the end of the story and realized I was crying. I could insert my name for Tina’s… 3 kids, a 19-year marriage ending after my ex cheated, and a similar “Bette” in my past. Thanks for sharing your experience and I agree with you about not regretting the past. From one shy, over-thinker to another, I wish you love and happiness on your journey. I hope you find someone
hey it was a beatiful story, and thank you for shering that with us, I hope that you find love again.
Thanks