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Everything and Nothing: 15.) Sur la Table
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Dont take too much off, I say. My hair is wet and I shiver as I feel Shanes comb move through it, grazing my neck. Im sitting on my back porch, on a kitchen chair, in my underwear and bra.
‘Kay, she says, voice muffled by the clip she is holding in her mouth. Then she removes the clip and twists a section of hair, anchoring the knot with the clip. Ill only take an inch off the length. The rest is just layers.
Okay.
I sniffle and shiver as I feel the cool blade move across my back as she cuts the bottom layer of hair.
So how come you never opened up your own salon, anyway?
Umm, capitol. I came close once, but it didnt work out.
Too bad. Is that something youd want to do?
Maybe in a few years Ill try to get a loan. Not right now.
You like the freedom of studio calls, dont you?
Exactly. And I’ll probably go back to Lather a few days a week too.
Thats great. And while youre doing that youll probably meet enough celebs that youll have no trouble opening up your salon, if thats what you want to do.
Thats the plan.
Good plan.
Yeah. I watch a brown rabbit comes out from under the bushes, nose quivering. He watches us with a wary black eye, still as can be except for his quivering nose, and the heart inside him that must be pounding fast from fear.
Actually,” Shane says, “Cherie was the one who was going to finance my salon. Her and her husband.
No *****?
Yeah. So its obvious why that fell through. Its a damn shame, because there was a prime chunk of real estate that was gonna be the salon. God, I ***** loved it.
I watch as the rabbit turns its head just a little, then bolts in a zigzag line, crashing toward the bushes on the other side of the yard. The noise makes Shane jump.
Just a little bunny rabbit.”
“*****, that scared me.”
“So how did that ***** wind up hitting the fan?
She sighs. Shes either going to say she doesnt want to go there, or shes gonna tell me.
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Y’know, if it weren’t for one thing, this chapter would be the hottest damn thing. Seeing words like ‘cunt’ in the midst of a love scene just snaps me right out of the moment in a very unpleasant way – especially considering this scene is supposed to be a very meaningful one between Darah and Shane. But it’s happened in previous chapters, as well. It’s just way, way, way too harsh a word for this context, I think.
And, darnit, I’ve got chair sex in ch 15 of Parallels. *grump*
Thanks guys.
Lilpink, especially, thank you. I’m sorry you aren’t down with the C-word.
I’ve gotten a lot of crit for using it in the past and choosing to use it was always a tough choice, but I decided to because that’s the way I think of it. I find “pussy” to be prissy, “twat” to be vulgar, “sex” (when used too much) to be cheesy, and “core” to be victorian and euphemistic.
Personally for me the C-word connotates a certain rawness that is sexy. Though it’s a widely used insult, I generally tend to find that more of a reflection of society than inherent in the word itself.
Sorry if the use offended; I’m a big fan of your work and was glad to know you enjoyed it otherwise.
I usually don’t mind the c-word – matter of fact, it’s one of my favorite cuss words ever – in fic, in certain contexts, it can be very effective, but like I said – it clashes really badly with the emotions you’re trying to evoke here, I think.
There’s no need to use euphemisms, though. I mean, I don’t use ‘core’ or ‘twat’ or ‘pussy’ or anything like that in my fics. I do use ‘sex’ but very sparingly. Usually, it doesn’t take much to give people a fairly clear idea of what’s going on without making it all about body parts and anatomy and the semantics of such. Because that’s usually not what the love scenes in Parallels are about, y’know?
i really like the use of the c-word (i feel weird writing it like that but don’t wanna offend anyone). i find it honest and sexy. personally when i read your sex scenes they flow for me and i honestly don’t notice the words you use, whereas with some other fictions on this site i piss myself laughing evertime i get to “love canal” which seems to be extremely popular. yeah so, uhh, just wanted to say there are different ways of writing sex scenes that are not “just sex”, and i like your detail november and the way you wrote this.
Exceptional dialogue writing, and the addition of the rabbit made it so much more real. And the sex really isn’t just sex anymore. Amazing chapter, I’m SURE you had a real good time writing that one.
Wow – amazing chapter – wow – well done.
Can’t remember every having just sex, All loving. that was an excellent chapter. Hope you enjoyed writing it as much as I enjoyed reading it Thanks
i think you are AMAZING…i am looking forward to the next part….
Wow!!! Only just caught this fic and read this chapter and now I’m gonna read all the others… Exceptional writing!
Thank you asrai, that means a lot to me. I mean, when you think of it to describe your own anatomy, it can only be so offensive. I was feeling bad though, so I’m glad to know I didn’t alienate everyone. Thanks for speaking up. :)
no problem. keep it up :) cunt-lovers of the world unite