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    Desperate Housedykes 3.01 ~*~ Season 3 – Wanker Style

    Story written on January 12, 2006 by TheLWankers.
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    Number of Comments: 7
    Words: 7003
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=58979
    Author Notes:

    The L Word Season 3, the L Wanker Way – JadedRogue/Janet Marie is first up to bat… swing batter batter…

    Desperate Housedykes 3.01 ~*~ Season 3 – Wanker Style

     

     

    Last Season on The L Word

     

    Jenny is a cutter, goes off to mommy and step daddy to get some help.  She meets Moira who sounds like Mickey Mouse on helium.

     

    Shane fell in love with Cherie and now is head over heels in love with Carmen and Carmen‘s mom is in the closet looking for a DRESS for Shane

     

    Kit slept with a guy who teaches TOE?  But wouldn’t sleep with sexy strapon wearing Ivan. 

     

    Tina had baby Angelica and DIDN’T die (I tried to start those rumors and make it true but alas, I failed.) and is back with Bette

     

    Bette was fired by Franklin, replaced by a guy who looks like Sawyer from Lost and got frumpy in the off season and needs a job she can be passionate about because her lover isn’t fucking her yet

     

    Helena was the heavy bad guy with the black hat and now she’s Alice‘s friend and potential love interest.

     

    Dana felt smothered by Alice and was like a lighthouse when sexy Lara Perkins graced her sight again and made her all wet in more ways than one.

     

    Alice was being Lenore!  Holding on too tight to Dana and started this hip lil radio show called “The Chart”  How original, is chewing RITALIN down like candy and is now a potential NASCAR driver 

     

     

    Desperate Housedykes Episode One

     

     

    Broadway  music playing in the background as a gang of women sit around and start at each other’s twats (used here because Carmen LOVES the word twat.and I love Carmen)  The first words out of their mouths is

     

                “Oh my god, where is it?”

     

    We are off to a bad start, women who don’t know where their twats are. 

     

                “No it’s horrible!”

     

    Oh boy!  This isn’t good.

     

                “Doll it looks like burnt curtains”

     

    Oh you get the picture, the ‘what the frack’ opening scenes are back. Onto our girls

     

     

    Betty Music  eww  Didja ever notice that Helena must be Bette‘s mirror image?  Cuz Bette opens the mirror and Helena closes it?  Same person, different view!  Anywhooo.

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    Comments

    2. Wasn’t bad, was up to your standard.You didnt have much to work with either. The young nice looking guy with the baby ,is really Laurel husband and baby. Read it in the newspaper. Thanks bvh

    5. yeah what’s up with moira? I think they picked someone way too femme/mainstream to be the transgender one. I’ve been diving into that subject, and they should have used like a 6’4″ bull dyke from texas if they wanted to make waves…i feel like “moira” is a toe in the kiddie pool, nice job though yeah you didn’t have much to work with the episode was hilarious but they completely are fucking over the people who watched the season 2 finale. Like they didn’t REALLY fill in the 6 month gap with this episode which i thought they would o. Did Carmen ever say I love you back? How is Helena still a member of the group. has jenny been in contact and when did she leave etc. when did kit and david start talking? this is just starting off bad

    6. Lmao, after the depressing, interesting, painful, humourous and dramatic first episode of season 3 we needed a bit of light hearted fun, thank you. xx

    7. the young dad is not laurel’s husband!laurel’s husband is named Paul Machereyand the actor who plays the young dad is John Reardonanyways, just starting to read this fic, and so far so good :)))

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