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1 Tina
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1.1 Tina
A Zippo clasped between my fingers. With a definitive click, the lighter sealed shut, resonating a sense of finality. ’Finalement!’ Renee exclaimed as she inhaled deeply, her eyelids gently shutting as if savoring the moment. ’I feel as though I am on death row, granted my solitary hour to stretch my legs. Despicable,’ she added with a distinct lilt to her words, her velvety French accent carrying a charm that matched her own. ’Mon dieu Tina, I want to go home.’
’I know.’ I responded with a sigh.
Her gaze softened as she nodded, a wisp of smoke curling from her nostrils, its hue mirroring the somber clouds looming above the hospital behind us. ’Just around the corner, there’s a bar. They undoubtedly serve Pastis.’ Her scrutinizing gaze met mine, her eyes as deep and intense as coal, as tendrils of smoke spiraled upwards, blending seamlessly with the overcast sky that enveloped the hospital’s architecture.
’Half a cigarette.’ I said sternly.
A sly smile tugged at her lips. ’You look like you could use a drink as well.’
’Finish it. I mean it.’ I insisted.
Her gaze held a knowing glint as she chuckled softly. ’She didn’t call did she? Is that why you’re so grumpy today?’
Truth be told, I had lost track of the days when I wasn’t oozing sarcasm and cynicism.
The wind, as if taking a cue from my demeanor, sliced through the air with a malicious glee, snatching fallen leaves from their resting places and thrusting them into a twisted dance around us. As if mocking the fragility of existence, nature reveled in its chaotic ballet.
With a begrudging resignation, I tugged at the collar of my coat, a futile defense against both the biting chill and the relentless march of time. My surrender was complete as I observed Renee, her fingers delicately poised, allowing the final traces of her cigarette to dissipate. Not that it held much consequence anymore, anyway.
The doctor’s words had been unambiguous. Renee, for her part, had embraced only the ambiguity, a refusal to grasp the impending verdict. Yet, the shadow loomed unmistakably—her final act was creeping nearer, a grand finale of smoke and ashes.
’Shall we go in? It’s cold.’ Without waiting for an answer I turned the wheelchair and pushed it toward the entrance.
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Hey ladies,
Welcome back!
I do remember Renee and the story of last year. I totally loved that one but this rewrite is catching my interest as well.
My heart is breaking for Bette and Tina, i want to cry for them and hope and wish they will find the love they once had.
And Renee being so sick, no cure possible. The catalist for Bette returning to Paris.
I’m looking forward to read the other parts.
A re-write? I’m curious to see what you’ve changed. I loved it the first time around and was waiting for an update.
Well, I’m off to reading now. :-)
It still hurts a lot to see T & B so miserable and unable to look at each other, let alone talk to each other.
I’m hooked again. Please more! :)
I was exciting seeing the tittle (not knowing of the meaning of 2.0 was). read the story eagerly, thinking it was another chapter of the other story. but then I read, Renee is still alive? hmm.. must be a past story, then.. I thought.. hmm.. it’s weird, the storyline seems different from the one without 2.0.
then I read Author Note, I should have read it sooner… hehehehe.. (so sorry.. I didn’t read the author note from the beginning because how eager I was to read it) so it is different story, with almost the same background .. and now I wonder what is the difference from the other one? well… my impression reading this one is less bitterness, a lot of stubbornness from both side,, and that makes me wonder what happened with them?
I love both stories, and can’t wait for the next one.. and thank you for sharing your work with us..
Ooh you’re back!! Thank you :)
I must say that this story is rather confusing to me… As you have no introduction into any background on this story. Who is Renee? Who is “I”… what’s going on… I am sorry to say that after 3 pages I simply quit reading as I still had no clue as what I was reading. If you are depending on the reader having read another story to figure out who these people are and what is going on, then you need to say so. But your story is like waking up and finding yourself somewhere you have never been before with people you do not know and why you or they are there… With any good story… you cannot assume your reader knows anything…. you must tell the reader what they need to know to get into the story..
I do remember your last story…. but I also remember that I had a great deal of difficulty following who was talking in your dialogue sequences… thus, I had a great deal of difficulty discerning the story line… Is this Bette talking or is it Tina? I guess some enjoy that style of story telling… I will say that I enjoyed Desert Rose far more than Uncharted Territory.
Good luck with this one. I wish you much success…