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    A Discourse on Desire..Chapter 16

    Story written on October 19, 2005 by cassandra_b.
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    45 votes, average: 3.36 out of 545 votes, average: 3.36 out of 545 votes, average: 3.36 out of 545 votes, average: 3.36 out of 545 votes, average: 3.36 out of 5 (45 votes, average: 3.36 out of 5)
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    Number of Comments: 15
    Words: 1666
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=57184
    Author Notes:

    Bette gets a divorce and finds Tina’s diary….reads it…

     She had not seen Tina leave. Her car was just not there, for a long time. Bette was worried, tried not to worry. She was angry. She was tempted to throw something
    at Tina when she said that, that…that nasty thing to her the last time they saw each other. But she did not want to give in, it was so easy to turn passion into anger, and Bette
    didn’t want to be a walking cliche. Instead she left right away, hurt and angry and sad. Why were things complicated…no….she made them complicated. And Paxton broke his
    silence, complicating her life further. He asked her why they were staying together and she replied he should leave if he wanted to. And he said he didn’t want to, did she? Bette
    was quiet at his question, yes she wanted to leave but where would she go? Tina hated her, and loved her….Bette knew she would take her in, lover her if Bette articulated
    her own feelings. But Bette didn’t know if Tina could get over to how cruel Bette was. And Bette was just tired of it all. Tired of it ALL. Paxton had waited for her answer, and
    Bette said…”I don’t know, do what you want…but i’m just going to continue living in this house and working my job, if you want to have a divorce let’s have a divorce…don’t
    know what i want…really don’t” Paxton nodded, then drank his coffee till Bette thought he was drowning. Paxton then with tears in his eyes said to her ..”no point in staying, there
    is nothing keeping us together” Bette had cried out at that, went to her knees and grappled at his pants…Paxton came down with her, they tore at each other until each were
    holding on to …something. Some ideal…they lay on the kitchen floor crying into their hair and shoulders, holding their lost dreams.

     And that was it . They signed divorce papers. Bette was free. But she did not feel it. She looked around the empty house, it felt empty anyway. Saw all the things that were Paxton’s gone. They had not
    even made love for the last time. Bette wanted to but Pax apologised, said he could not touch her that way again…it would make him sick. Bette nodded, they were beyond being
    hurt by the other’s truth. Bette felt she had lost an integral part of her life. She did love Pax, and Pax would always love her. But some people just fall apart, some people cannot
    go past seeing the other’s flaws. Bette didn’t know how much she lost before it was gone. Bette cursed love, why was it necessary to love? Why couldn’t it be easier? Why did
    stupid Tina have to come around and set fire to her heart, that sickened organ?

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    Comments

    5. wow..crap! with this knowledge will Bette ever speak her mind?..pls don’t let Tina come back with a man!…i can really feel Tina’s inner conflict….post soon!(“,)

    6. I’ve never commented before, but I just want to say that this story is fantastic. Some have criticised you for not writing Bette and Tina like they are in the show, but I disagree with them. Your version of Bette and Tina, to me, seems to be the ‘dark side’ of B&T. That if you were to cut away all the redeeming characteristics they possess, like Tina’s patience and Bette’s ambition, this is what you’d be left with. In a way that’s more real, everyone has a dark side including B&T and you have explored this area of them that so often is left unseen. I also love the way you write, I’ll admit there are times when it makes me uncomfortable to the point where I can barely read it, but that’s what good writing is stuff that really takes you to the extremes… And your writing certainly does that.

      Oh and you like Arcade Fire? Your taste in music is just as good as your stories.

    7. Enjoying the story but it is certainly different than any other beginning for our girls. I can only describe this story as an underside of the girls that we know as we do, maybe dark side would be a better description. Very different. Please don’t let Tina come back with a man. Oh my, that would really ruin things. Thanks.

    8. Still lovin this story! poor confused Tina gotta feel for her! so Bettes got some work ahead especially if Tina comes back with a man!!! and im looking forward to reading all the details…lol thanks really enjoying it.

    9. Tina is in so much pain..Bette is the one to do something or she will lose tina for good..i hope they talk a heart to heart talk..great chappy post soon thanks :o)

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