Kit: “Now why the ***** didn’t you just say that before all this?  We could have been to the store and back home already.  Well….you want me to go with you baby girl?”

Tina smiled as she watched Kit struggle to free herself from Dana’s anchor of a noggin.  “Nah.  It’ll be quicker if I go myself.  I’ll only be a minute.”

Alice and Bette had planted themselves just beyond the tree line.  They had made a couple of make shift leaf beds and were lying flat on their stomachs.  Alice peered through the scope of her rifle and didn’t take her eye away for a second.  She looked like a pro, and Bette was beginning fear that Alice might actually know what she was doing.

“Did you ever shoot a gun before?”

Alice had been chewing on a piece of straw from the ground.  Without removing her eye from the scope, she simply said, “Yep,” and continued to coolly chew away.”

Bette: “I mean a real gun, Alice, not a paint ball one.”

Alice stopped chewing and said, “Oh, well, nonot exactly.  But, how much different could it be?  You just aim and shoot, right?  Same rules apply.”

Bette: “Well, that’s not entirely true, Alice.  Once you squeeze the trigger on that thing, well, you won’t just be ruining someone’s shirt.”

Alice sighed and said, “Is this where the lecture about “taking precious life and what it’ll do to me” comes into play?  We’re talking about the difference between Tommy the Turkey and Santa Clause here, Bette.  Santa being human, of course, and Tommywell, being dinner.  See the difference?  It’s nature.”

Bette: “A turkey is a defenseless animal, Alice.  If you pull that trigger, it’ll leave a scar.”

Alice: “Aw, have you been watching Dr. Phil again?  That’s cute.” 

Bette: “It’ll never heal Alice, never.”

Alice: “Okay, wanna know how I know this is all just bullshit so you can save yourself a thousand bucks?   Case in point, Dana and ***** girl’s engagement party”

Bette: “Who? Tonya?”

Alice: “Was there another, cuz I must have missed it”

Bette rolled onto her back and said, “Continue with your point please”