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Bette and Tina take time to process – Chapter 16
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“Babe I didn’t want to have ‘sex’, I wanted you to make love to me that morning out of desire as your lover and not just as the woman that was trying to conceive your baby. I know maybe I was being irrational feeling the way I did. You’re right we weren’t doing the insemination ourselves that day. I know we didn’t really have time with everything else going on but the fact that we were doing the insemination in the doctor’s office made me want to connect with you physically somehow.”
“Tina I know planning to conceive a baby affected our sex life. We were having sex more often than in the three previous years but we mostly only had sex when we were inseminating. Even though our times together were planned and timed to be optimal for conception the sex was good between us. I never stopped desiring you, but maybe because it was so calculated we’d forgone the intimacy and spontaneity of the act. After a while it became rote. Like I said it wasn’t a conscious thought but maybe you making the decision to do the inseminations in the doctor’s office whether it worked or not meant that I’d failed you in my role. You didn’t need me anymore so I pulled away.”
“How could you think I didn’t need you Bette? I needed you more than ever. Whether it was a conscious thought or not your message was loud and clear. I was on my own especially after the way you acted in Dr. Wilson’s office later that morning when she suggested that the insemination stood a better chance of working if I was aroused.”
Tina lay on the examination table in Dr. Wilson’s office. As the doctor examined Tina, Bette stood close by holding her hand and smiling to reassure Tina. When Dr. Wilson concluded the exam she picked up the specimen cup containing Sean’s sperm.
Dr. Wilson: “OK I’m going to take a look at this and while I’m gone …” looking at Bette “remember how I told you that there is a fair amount of evidence that it’s more likely to take if you’re aroused?” she winks and smiles at Bette before leaving them alone in the room.
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So glad they are making progress. Thanks, enjoyed it
Thank you wkm. Glad you are enjoying the progress. Lots more to come.
BETTE would get TINA warmed up time after time only to pump the brakes when TINA wa ready to make love.DAN was a counselor yet BETTE felt they didn’t need one.BOTH BETTE/TINA was to wrapped up in their own problems to see that this way of thinking was THE PROBLEM .Looking for donors it became what ever the other one wanted not what THEY wanted.BETTE found the donor,BETTE picks the guy to go home with them,BETTE finds the second donor all her choices yet TINA just went along.TINA confides in friends when she should talk to BETTE,TINA inseminates herself ,TINA has a reality check when MARCUS turns out to be black.To share all these hidden truths between them and at the end of the day realizes that there is still enough of a spark to ignite the sexual urges for each other gives them hope that this too can be put in the category of what not to do when planning a baby.Let the love they know is there shine thru.Best quote of this ”ze penis,ze pussy ,ze baby” that was one for the history books.pps thanks
dunnthat. Thank you for commenting and providing great insight. The point of rehashing all this history is to understand, forgive, and move on. Most importantly to learn from mistakes, pay attention to the warning signs, and not repeat bad behaviours. They are making good progress emotionally and eventually the physical relationship will resume.
Thanks for this great chapter.
One step at a time, they are reconnecting .
the entire constellation.
mscully – thank you for reading, commenting and rating. I love it when you reward my chapters with ‘the entire constellation’ :-)
Like what mscully said one step at a time, they already have talked much about a lot of their problems and it was very wise to ask Paul for his insight when they were not able to do that by them selves, but they are making progress.
The flashback that Bette came home earlier to spend time with Tina, trying to reconnect, and that Tina went to the gym, was for me absolutely heart breaking, it showed how disconnect they were.
I didn’t like the first few chapters, but Bat, you have defiantly my attention again.
Thanks for sharing your talent with us!
Bibi28 – thank you for sticking with the story. I know it was a rough beginning and I really appreciate that you gave it chance. Bette and Tina are going to progress by leaps and bounds before the end of this retreat.