Why?

She looks down at me thoughtfully. Is she debating whether to tell me the truth or fabricate an elaborate lie? Is she scouring her mind for a reason much like I am at the moment – a reason for me to stay? Or perhaps shes wondering why she has made such a ridiculous request in the first place?
Because I need you, she says reluctantly, as if testing out the feel of such a response for the first time.

And I chuckle lightly at her response because its Shane who says it to me, and she doesnt need anyone. She doesnt need promises and commitments. Being with her should be so very simple but its not. It is then that I finally take a moment to think about this very strange fact. With Shane, it should be so simple because I dont love her and people often claim that love complicates things. With Shane, its all about wanting and taking. Bar the consequences. She claims to need me. I dont believe that and I tell her this.

If possible, Shanes more shuttered than before. Shes always been so guarded. Impenetrable Shane. I didnt think that anything I could have said would have been of enough consequence to hurt her. Hurt her enough to cause her to build up yet another wall around her fragile interior. Im remorseful now. I regret my words all too late.

She climbs out of my bed wearily. Dresses silently. Leaves.

~~

Were on the beach. Its sunset. No, sunrise. Maybe its midday. I dont notice because Im too absorbed by the sight of Dana, too entranced by her carefree laughter. Shes radiant today, practically glowing. Happier than I have seen her in a long time. Shes bounding down the shoreline, buoyant, bubbling with joy. I dont attempt to catch up to her, and she never allows herself to be more than several steps ahead.

She casts feverous glances in my direction every couple steps. The heat of the sun, the sand, and of Danas presence consumes me. It strikes me how different this is from my rendezvous with Shane, which started hot and passionate but had cooled to a different type of intensity all together. Being with Dana sets me aflame. The more Im with her, the hotter I burn. It will never end.