Fan Fiction
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Chapter 17 – Only together, only forward
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”Are you ready again, too? … you said you weren’t ready for therapy yet…” Bette thought about it quickly, looking into Tina’s eyes uncomprehendingly.
”We should be together in this” Tina held both of Bette’s hands in hers and nodded at her. ”Let’s not split up”
Bette was startled by her wife’s words. She knew that Tina had experienced Olivia’s death more consciously, even though she had been on antidepressants for a long time. But this topic still caused a lot of pain, so Tina also preferred not to touch on it, not to talk about it. The fact that she was ready to resume therapy and be in it with Bette, ready to share this pain, meant a lot to the brunette right now. And she began to cry again. So many tears in one day was something completely unnatural for Bette, but she felt that she was getting a little easier after such an outburst of emotions, which at this time of life sometimes overwhelm her. She leaned her forehead against Tina’s, their hands entwined. They both sat with their eyes closed and said nothing.
”Thank you, thank you” These were the only words Bette said in a whisper, still sitting in the same position and stroking the backs of Tina’s hands with her thumbs.
”Jesus Christ!” Bette flinched, released Tina abruptly, and turned when she heard the loud sound of something falling from behind. They saw Angie, who accidentally dropped her gardening tools. She gritted her teeth and looked at her mother guiltily.
”I’m sorry, I just wanted to get some fresh basil to decorate the cake”
Tina surreptitiously wiped the small wet tear marks under her eyes. ”You’re going to give mom a heart attack someday, dear” She raised an eyebrow and looked at her daughter affectionately.
”I’m sorryyyy! I’m leaving!”
”Have you made the cake yet?” Bette asked before Angie disappeared into the house.
”Yeah, and we made another mini cake to try it out now. Join us!”
Angie left, and Bette turned back to Tina and stared into her eyes, as if thinking of something important. This look was mesmerizing, interested, expressed love and gratitude, and seemed to look directly into the soul. Bette didn’t say anything, but Tina understood. After a few seconds, Bette came out of this mini-trance and looked up, suggesting that Tina go to the girls.
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This story is very sad, yet inspiring. From the depths of despair can come hope if one will just look for it. Bette and Tina have both repressed their feeling of loss and hurt for a long time. And although this loss is something they will never get over they must learn to live with it and to put their lives into a loving and caring relationship with each other and with Angie. Its time to acknowledge the loss, feel the pain, heal each other and learn how to go forward as a result. Loss of a child is devastating. Dealing with it even more difficult. It can tear families apart… these two need each other… I believe they have made a good and positive start. They just need to get to the point where they turn to each other every time, when in need of comfort and solace and to be present when those times arise.
Thanks for the update….
Thank you for reading, Martha!
I really like your phrase “from the depths of despair can come hope if one will just look for it”
I think it makes a lot of sense.
Hi Ada,
This was so good, i almost don’t have words to describe how this chapter touched my heart.
I don’t have children and can’t imagine what a devasted loss it is when your child suddenly dies, but you did a excellent job to describe what Bette and Tina went through when they lost Oli.
I have full confidence in that this therapist will help Bette and Tina to come to terms with the loss of Oli and give it a place.
For the rest, I can only say that I fully agree with what Martha has written in her comment.
This is definitely one of the best chapters you have written!
I know I don’t always write a comment but I’ll follow your story from the beginning and through to your last chapter!
Thank you, be careful and stay healthy!
Thank you so much for such wonderful words, Bibi!
Although your comments are not frequent, they are always very interesting to read. The feedback is really important to me, and the fact that you gave it this time is so nice. I hope that you will enjoy the continuation of this story no less. Thanks and be careful too!
Ok, it was not easy chapter also.
I like the story about how Tina’s cold reaction on Kit’s death might be subconsciously reaction and even revenge for Bette’s reaction for Oli’s death. I think it’s very trustworthy. – as the story in s3 when i think all Henry story was Tina’s subconsciously revenge to Bette for carpenter.
Yeah, when viewing s3, I had the same thoughts.
Thank you, Zhenya!
Wow! Such an emotional chapter and very well articulated. The depth of these characters is never ending. Great chapter.
Thank you very much! This is so important.