"So why do you think you feel that way about yourself?".

I sat observing the older woman before me, we had been going through process for a little over an hour and already I was agitated and a mess.

"I don’t know I just do".

Why did it seem she was asking all these stupid questions. I just wanted to get rid of the weight on my shoulders… But instead as I sat there and cautiously looked at this woman I found myself more confused than I had before I came.

It had taken alot for me to come here today, but still I felt like this wasn’t enough. I knew change would not come over night but the way I felt about myself these days depressed my whole outlook on life. Tina deserved better, so did our little girl for that matter. But I finally realised I deserve to be rid of this burden and be happy; truly happy.

"Bette, I sense your apprehension towards me but if you’re not honest with me how can I help you. You came to me for my professional advice and that is what I shall give. But lets be upfront with one another. Do you even want to be here?" She seemed cold in the way she spoke at times but I also knew I had to be fair to her as well as myself. This was her job for Christ sake and I just thought of these questions as nothing more than an insult to my intelligence.

"I… I want to be here. I have to be here. If I don’t know how to fix me how can I know what it will take to salvage mine and Tina’s relationship." My heart felt crushed by the pressure that had been surrounding it for sometime. But I had stupidly ignored it trying to press on with life. But I guess I can finally say after all these years it’s all finally caught up with me.
"So you think you are to salvage what you and Tina once shared?". Pushing her glasses above her head she smiled tilting her head waiting for me to respond.

"Yes I think we can. Why don’t you?".

"Bette, my dear this isn’t necessarily about what I think rather more so what you feel is right. I can not pick apart your relationship for that would be unethical for me considering I do not know Tina. But also more for the fact I know she is carrying your child." I can’t explain the way her eyes told me she understood that Tina was a raw subject and unless I spoke about her she would not push matters further.