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    is this love = chp 119

    CHAPTER 119
    Bette looked up from her book at Tina. They were both on comfortable recliners under a cabana enjoying the relaxation that seemed to just come automatically with life in Nevis. Well – that was true for one of them and for once the one chilled and calm was Bette and the one sitting with her net-book on her lap typing away was Tina. They had tossed a coin for whose computer they brought with them – Bette had lost and she had not really given much thought to the gallery other than to check her emails every evening to see if there was anything urgent from James – so far there hadn’t been so she was spending her time reading and enjoying the holiday. Tina was into her second hour on the net-book. What had started with her wanting to check the MBA courses in more detail had lead her to emailing the University to ask if it was possible to split the degree and take units from the Film Studies course and the MBA as well. She had got an email that morning saying that it was possible and since then she had been debating what courses to take.
    “Tina “
    The blonde looked up after a few seconds “Yeah – what ?”
    “Remember me ?”
    Tina smiled “Sorry – there are just some really great units in the Film Studies option and its hard to pick which ones I would want to do “
    “Do they need to know today ?”
    “No – of course not.”
    Bette raised an eyebrow “Just checking “
    “Okay – just tell me I am neglecting you “
    “You are in danger of neglecting me “
    “You have your book “
    “Did you really just say that Tina Kennard ?”
    “No –that was someone else. Sorry – its just that I was so disappointed to miss out on the MBA because of the job and now it looks like it could be on again.”
    “What about the fees and everything ?”
    “Fairly high but I can afford them “
    “And what about everything else ?”
    “I know its going to be tight for a while and I said so much about being able to treat you to things and really spoil you but “
    “I know – in the long run this is an investment for your future and you know that I will do anything that I can. I want you to succeed – I hope that I don’t even have to spell out to you that I will do anything for you – if its in my power then I will do it “
    Tina nodded “And I am thanking you by ignoring you – I am sorry “
    “Its okay – why don’t we do something after lunch – maybe see how much of Helena’s scuba diving lessons that you remember from a few months ago. I would hate to leave the island and not to have got some hours in under water”
    “Have you looked to see if there are any opportunities near here “
    “No but you are the one with the access to the world wide web”
    “Okay and to make it up to you – I will pay for it”
    “Shouldn’t you be saving your cash Tina ?”
    “I can afford it “
    “Seriously – -we do need to sit down and work out the figures. I know that you are unlikely to get any of your fees paid but it might be worth seeing if there is anything – you are a mature student”
    “Immature in my case – okay – lets see if I can find us some diving school”
    Bette went back to her book and was just reaching an interesting part of it when Tina cursed. The way she spat the words out sounded like she was mighty unhappy.
    “What’s the matter ?”
    “Email from my mother “
    “And how is she ?” Bette asked
    “Unbelievable “
    “That doesn’t sound good “
    “It is not – she just takes the biscuit “
    “What ?”
    “Listen to this – Tina darling, I hope that you and Bette are having a good time on holiday. You certainly deserve to be having a great time with your woman. Helena and I have been talking about what happened with Peggy and we do not think that you should resign. We are sure that Peggy never meant for you to know about what happened between the three of us and it doesn’t impact you “
    “WHAT ! “ Bette said “ Is that a spoof email ?”
    “Not unless the secure server of a top New York law firm has been hacked – and I don’t think it has. Where was I ? – we understand that you were shocked and upset by what happened but this is your future and you cannot throw it away on a point of principle. Nothing has changed between you and I darling and I want the best for you and that has to be working for Peggy”
    Tina looked at Bette “Now why would my mother think that I wouldn’t want to read that on my holidays – what on earth is she thinking “
    “She might be trying to protect you “
    “I am not a child “ Tina said angrily “Damn – she’s got me getting mad at you – I am sorry Bette but how can she speak to me like that – it doesn’t impact me – of course it does. Can she not see that I cannot trust Peggy “
    “She doesn’t want you to miss out on the job”
    “Do you think she is right ?”
    “No – because as you say you are not a child and that’s the tone of the email. Its insulting and I do not blame you for being cross”
    “I cannot throw my career away on a point of principle – is that because she has never had a principle in her life. At least I have principles “
    Bette frowned – it was freakish how many times Emma Kennard could screw up quality time that she had planned with Tina. If Emma felt like this about the job it was odds on that she would not understand when she found out that Tina was not taking the job and would be doing the Masters course of her own choosing – not one that her mother would pick for her. This would be YET ANOTHER battle zone for Tina and Bette together against Emma. Bette was getting more than fed up with it.
    “At what point is your mother going to realise that you are a grown woman ?”
    “When hell freezes over “ Tina replied. She looked at the email for a few minutes before starting to type
    “Are you sure that you are calm enough to reply to her ?”
    “No “
    Bette knew the note of steel in Tina’s voice meant that she needed to be left alone to be angry. There were times when biting your tongue was not the right thing to do and you needed to let off steam. Bette went back to her book and after a few sentences she looked across. Tina had stopped typing
    “What’s up ?”
    Tina voiced what Bette had been thinking “How do you think she will take the news about what I am thinking about doing ?”
    “Not well “ Bette replied
    “No” Tina hit a button and looked at Bette “ She is not going to be happy”
    “Its your life “ Bette said
    “It is – but its also our life. The one that you and I have talked about sharing when I get the time to move all my stuff in with you. I have to do the right thing for both of us. I am sorry Bette – I wasn’t thinking straight. Is me doing this course right for us ?”
    “Yes “
    “You are certain ?”
    Bette put the book down and swung round on the recliner to face Tina
    “If you had taken Peggy’s job it would have been full time – no giving you a lesser work load because of the MBA – you would have been in the office by 7 and lucky to escape before 7 at night. At least 3 nights a week you would have had classes – probably from 7 until 10. On the nights when you were not in class you would be doing course work – probably until midnight – that doesn’t leave you much time for sleeping let alone having time with me. Somehow we would have got through it but it would have been very hard. Doing the course yourself means it will not be as hard for you – you can study and spend time in the library and have some fun. I want what is best for you Tina. I don’t care about you not taking me on exotic holidays – I can do that for you and you can do that for me when you are earning big bucks with the Masters degree in your pocket. We will sort the money out – what I have is yours. Ti – you have to know how I feel for you and I know how you feel for me – what we have is real and long lasting. “
    Tina was close to tears at Bette’s words. She closed the net-book and took Bette’s hands
    “Doing it this way feels right. My other mom used to say that you should always listen to your gut because 90% of the time it was right and you shouldn’t second guess yourself or spend too long listening to other people. You have to be true to yourself. Working for Peggy after hearing the way she spoke to mom would be wrong for me. This is something that I want to do. Can we sit down after dinner and figure out the maths. If I sell the apartment I can do this easily “
    “You are pretty sure that you are going to be able to live with someone as tidy as me ?”
    Bette teased
    “I might have to make you a little bit untidy but we will be fine “
    “We have two weeks before we go back home “
    “I know but I want to have our plans fixed “
    “You know that Emma will probably go nuts “
    “Its not her life – its mine and this could be so right for me and for us – that isn’t up for debate Bette. We are going to do what is best for us. I am not a child – I am a adult who is mature enough to start living with her partner “ Tina shook her head “I know we have said this a lot of times since we started dating but its about time we drew a line in the sand and decided that this was as far as we will go. My mother has tried to control my life for too long. Your mom and dad are not like that “
    “My mom and dad – to be fair to them really stopped trying to tell me what to do when I was about 15. I have always known my own mind – not that I am saying that you don’t in case you strangle me but “ Bette sighed “My folks think that you should let your kids make mistakes because that way they learn for themselves. I did dumb things when I was growing up and yes they had to bail me out now and again but for the most part if I messed up I got myself out of the mess I created”
    “If we ever had kids do you think that we would be that cool ?”
    Bette smiled “ I hope we would.”
    “Do you think that compared to you I am spoilt ?”
    Bette knew the answer to that question “I think our parents were different. You bunked off school to go to the movies, I was a swot who just wanted to be left to live my life without a parent telling me what was best for me. “
    “I was spoilt and I probably still am “
    “But the price has been how your mom thinks that she can run your life”
    “That’s why I want to do this Bette – not because I know she will hate the idea. But because I know its right for me. I do feel so much stronger and like I can do anything I set my mind to and that is down to you. We are going to figure this out while we are here and when we get back I will fix up an interview and I might put my apartment on the market – see what sort of price I would get. It will be enough to pay all my fees and give me a monthly allowance to live on. I want this Bette “

    Page 1 of 212


    1. Applaus for Tina ????????????

      She has so much more confidence and doesn’t let Emma interfere with her life.

      It is really sad that Emma does try to interfere with her life. Let Tina make her own decisions. She has Bette stand behind her. It is so good to see that they discuss everyting and talk about everyting that matters. What matters is how they deal with what life thrown them and how they handle it as couple.

      I love this couple ♥️

      Thanks for the update!

    2. Bette is wise beyond her years. Her ability to see future problems in her relationship with Tina and yet hold back in influencing her decisions is most loving thing she could do. This is what Tina sees finally. The job would be lucrative but would involve long hours and the MBA would involve even more hours. Yet she was willing to go with the flow and deal with it because this is what Tina wants. Bette and Tina would be little more than bed mates until the MBA was complete. That would be rough on any relationship and doubly so with one in its early stages. And the job would be no picnic either. This was not a 40 hour week but more like a 60 to 70 hour week plus travel. With big compensation packages come big demands. It is difficult to have a balanced personal relationship when one of the parties is has such a high time commitment to their profession. Young people then to put their professional lives before their personal lives and their relationships suffer. It takes a very mature person not only to realize that people work to live are far happier than those of live to work.

      In my opinion, a large part of the problems between Tina and Emma is with Emma’s value of work and money as the definite standard of the character of a person – the more money, the more power they yield, the more worthwhile they are as a human being. Emma’s concern with Tina not taking this job is the loss of the money and power it yields. Emma sees little value in job satisfaction. She admires Bette not because she is working in a profession for which she derives joy because of her association with arts expression, but that she is successful as a businesswoman yielding the power of her position to make more money. Kate must have been a lawyer because she loved the work and what a lawyer does for the benefit of the society. But for Kate, her relationship with her partner and her child were just as important a part of her life as her profession. And in certain instances they were more important. I believe that Tina is going to be more like my perception of Kate than like Emma. And she is going to be influenced by Bette as well in that eventually she will end up in a profession for which she has a passion for. And as long as she earns enough money to meet what she perceives she needs for her life, she will be happy. But in the end, Tina’s most valued possession will be her relationship with Bette and her family and friends, not the job she held or the money she made, which is what defines Emma.

      Outstanding chapter. Bette is such a high quality person. Tina is growing up. Tina beginning to consider the impact of her decisions on their relationship with Bette is very key to their future. Tina is doing what is best for her and standing on principle as well. But there was a hint that Tina may ask Bette to support her by severing the relationship with Peggy. I hope not. Tina must allow Bette to run her own professional life just as Bette is allowing Tina to make her own decisions. For Tina this situation is personal. For Bette, its business. So make the decision, announce it and move on.

      Thank you. for this.

    3. I love this story and think this is one of my favorite depictions of Bette ever. She is so patient and kind and loving with Tina. Yet subtly gets her points across. She quietly picks her battles with Tina but is certainly not afraid to act with others if she feels Tina might be hurt. She will make an excellent wife and mother.

      Tina is working things through and that is great but she needs to remember that they are on a romantic holiday and some of the drama can wait until they get home. Why begin yet another battle with Emma while on vacation? Can neither mother nor daughter resist? Is this the dance they are just so used to doing with one another? Seems like it is. Tina should take a step back and enjoy her time with her partner. Taking on her mother and Peggy should be able to wait a few weeks. I am surprised that Helena did not advise Emma to wait until Bette and Tina return. She knows from experience about unwanted interference.

      Here is my major takeaway from this chapter:

      “I cannot throw my career away on a point of principle – is that because she has never had a principle in her life. At least I have principles.”

      Emma Kennard is no better than Peggy Peabody. Both women are driven and used to getting their way. Both are experts at dirty tricks. For me Emma and the painting and Peggy and the escorts are analogous. Tina is more understanding and accepting of her mother’s motives than she is of Peggy’s. Moreover, Tina seems to accept that her mother lacks ethics and principles. She does not like it but she knows that is who her mother is. How do we know? Tina has said it enough. We have seen it enough. Tina still does not think her mother and Helena will last. Remember how Bette and Tina met? Remember that Emma went behind Rosemary’s back to try to get Tina and Helena together? Remember that drama? Deceptive tactics and lack of trust have been a part of this story from the beginning. Suddenly Peggy’s attempt to get Helena or Emma to cheat is a bridge too far? And she refuses to work with Peggy because she is now someone she cannot ‘trust.’ In my opinion this situation is not that simple. First off – Bette is a successful businesswoman and needs to be free to continue working with Peggy. Bette does not see Peggy for anyone other than who she is. Bette knows Peggy is flawed. Bette knows Peggy can be tough as nails and a bit ruthless. Still, Bette loves Peggy despite those flaws. Kind of like Tina knowing her mother lacks principles and has to get her own way? Peggy and Emma are branches off of the same tree. Peggy is already feeling bad and Tina not taking the job is going to be very rough. Emma piling on about it will only makes things worse. To what end?

      Is Bette the only one who knows about Peggy’s desire for grandchildren? Am I the only one who has any empathy for Peggy? She is going about things entirely wrong just as Emma did with the painting and the email to Tina while on holiday. Both women insist on getting their own way and interfere. Peggy truly believes she is right. Emma believes she is right. That is no excuse for either woman in any way. But it is the truth. Both are mothers and making mistakes.

      Tina may find not working with people she cannot trust difficult once she gets her MBA and enters the work force. Peggy’s latest attempt to break up Helena and Emma should have been kept between the three of them. It really does not involve Tina. She certainly deserves to not like it – to be angry about it – to voice that anger – and not approve of such tactics- like Bette did. But she also needs to be done with it. And remember – Tina believed Helena HAD cheated. What would Tina have done if it was true? If Tina expects Bette to sever ties with Peggy that will be naive and unfair. Is she prepared to sever ties with her mother for the same character flaws? Not that simple.

      I love this story. I love that it is multi layered with flawed characters and nothing is black and white except for Bette and Tina’s love.

    4. It is refreshing how honest they are with each other. From the very beginning there were no manipulative games between them, little hickups aside. They have such a wonderful relationship. I hope they stay that way and will not be deterred by the drama created be HelEmPeg.

      I guess doing full time studies and earning a great, fulfilling job afterwards on her own will be more satisfying for Tina. Peggy’s job offer was incredibly but now Tina has the chance to do exactly what she dreamt of.

      Thanks for this “honeymoon chapter”, Ally.

    5. When I see the long insightful comments I feel I should try harder to make mine longer!

      So sorry but:-
      I love this Bette
      I find this Tina adorable
      I adore the story and
      I am staying safe and washing my hands properly:-)

      Please make the Story a long one Ally but keep them together getting through life’s issues and against all others

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