Tina lifted her head and gave Alice an intent look. ”I know.” She took another sip of her coffee. ”I don’t know what is wrong with me,” she gave Alice an uneasy look. ”Watching her, feeling the energy, the power that comes off her when she is excited about art. I haven’t seen it or felt it in a very long time.” She sighed, ”I know she has sacrificed a lot over the years. When I was at my worst, I think I was taking count on who sacrificed more.” Tina paused, ”We have come so far at putting balance back into our relationship, I guess… I am also worried about her getting lost in this hunt.”

Alice watched her friends of over two decades deal with their conflicting passions. She knew that this struggle would have to be dealt with time and again if they were going to make it with what she knew would be their last effort at reconciliation. ”Have you ever thought that Bette may be holding back with you because of a fear of taking too much space in your relationship,” she said in a quiet tentative voice.  ”We both know she is terrified that she will cause you to leave again.”

Tina sat staring off at the mountains, thoughtlessly bringing the cup up to her mouth and taking a sip.  ”Yes…” she nodded her head without looking at her blonde friend. ”I just don’t know what to think, I don’t want her having regrets about lost opportunities out of fear of losing me. Tina turned to face Alice, ”Years ago, when we were still here in LA, we were talking about where we wanted to be in 10 years.” Tina chuckled, ”Neither of us thought a divorce for sure, anyways she said, ”There is no passion to be found in playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.”  Tina gave a small smile, ”I want her to be who she is 100% of the time and I fear that she is holding parts of herself back out of concern of hurting me.  I love all of her and her passion is one of the things I love the most,” Tina sighed.  ”We want this to work so badly that I worry that we are making concessions, something our therapist told us to be mindful of not doing when it came to our core selves.