Bette/Tina: Yes

“OK. The first thing is to try to control your temper. Talk things out in a calm manner. There is no need for bloodshed. We all lose control sometimes but doing that can only be destructive. Don’t lash out with the intent to inflict pain and hurt on each other. Secondly be in tuned to each others wants and needs and put them before your own sometimes. It’s give and take in the relationship. Third, you need to respect each others views and hear each other out. Try to fully understand what the other is saying both verbally and non verbally. Put your own thoughts and opinions aside and really listen. Lastly love each other always. Nothing is more important. You’ve been given the gift of love so treasure it. Deal with things as they come up and keep the love alive. And don’t forget to kiss and make up!”

“Don’t worry I’m not going to monopolize this entire discussion.” Emma knew that she was talking a lot and didn’t really give them a chance to respond but she wanted them to hear the ground rules and agree to them or else the sessions would be a waste. ”I want to say one more thing then I’ll shut up and let you talk. You both have to accept that neither of you is exactly the same person you were when you broke up or even when you got together in the first place. You’ve both been changed by your experiences and the events in your life over the years. Our goal here is not to try to recapture what you had but to restructure the relationship to meet each other’s needs as it stands ‘today’. Now I’d like to hear your thoughts on what I’ve laid out?”

“Doc I agree with everything that you’ve said. We are in a good place right now and we’re communicating better than ever before. I think we’ve done really well not to lose our temper but I know I may have a tendency to lash out and I will try to control that. We know that we will have disagreements. We have to learn ways to bring them to resolution instead of running away from them as we’ve done in the past. We are definitely different people. We don’t need to lose our individuality and look to the other person to define us. I want us to be able to stand on our own and complement and complete each other without feeling threatened.” Bette responded first.