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    The Idea of Space

    Throwing back the blanket and sitting up on the edge of the bed, she ran a hand back through her hair and loosened a few knots. Afterwards, she slowly rose and turned to make the bed by herself, tucking it in a way that she remembered Bette had always done, then cautiously left Bette’s bedroom to make her way downstairs.

    When Tina entered the kitchen, Bette looked up from the morning paper and cast a small, half smile at the blonde who peered back at her with a clouded expression.

    “Good morning.” Bette greeted as she gestured to a cup on the counter and the coffee maker. Tina didn’t meet Bette’s eye directly, but she did wander to the counter and pour herself a cup of black coffee. Bette returned to reading the morning paper and waited for Tina to either sit down at the table or join her at the kitchen island. She watched out of the corner of her eye as Tina did, in fact, join her at the kitchen island, further away and at the end, alongside where Bette, herself, was standing.

    “About last night… I…”

    “You fell asleep very fast, so I got up and slept in the spare bedroom.” Bette cut her off with a forward retelling of the events after the blonde had hit the point of slumber. Although her tone wasn’t harsh as she spoke, her eyes were still invested in skimming an article about some hot and young new local artist that had won some vaguely familiar local award. She made it a point not to look at Tina, to act as though nothing out of the ordinary had occurred and everything was just as it should be. As open as she was, there still had to be that matter of defensive strategy after the previous nights events.

    “You slept in the spare bedroom.” Tina repeated, watching the side of Bette’s face, her gaze trained there as she lifted her hot mug of coffee.

    “Precisely,” Bette replied after a moment, turning the page once she was done that article to skim another, but not without continuing. “But what happened last night won’t happen again, whether you believe I can be trusted or not, it’s cruel.”

    “I know,” Tina stated, the relief and the guilt twisting her stomach in an uncomfortable knot. “I don’t even know why I assumed…” Bette’s cellphone began to ring from where it lay on the counter behind the taller, dark haired woman., effectively interrupting Tina once again. Better turned and offered Tina a look, seeing the discomfort written upon the blue eyed woman’s face, as she reached for her phone. Bette answered the call.

    Comments

    1. Hey Sloan,

      Very good that Bette slept in the guest room and spoke to Tina about her behaviour and pointed out she behaved the same way as to when she had those feelings for men. And Tina’s first reaction is to deny it.

      It’s strange but good that Angie is bringing the truth out to Tina about her behavior and the reasons for it. Depression isn’t fun and people can do and say weird things but I’m having a bit of trouble with this statement about Tina’s weird and bitch behavior towards Bette.
      It’s time for her to take a good look at herself and take responsibility, until now she seems to blame Bette and she seems jealous of Bette.

      Let Tina find a good psychologist and discuss and solve all her problems. For now I don’t think she is the partner Bette deserves, she is selfish and flees from herself and her family for years. She has no idea what she’s done to Bette and her daughter and still does with her urge to get the best out of herself because she thinks that’s what makes her happy. On the contrary, she is unhappy and does not know why. Again, as long as she persists in this behavior, I would advise Bette to distance herself from Tina to protect herself.

    2. Bette making the decision to sleep in the guest room was wise, as was her pointed response to Tina about it not happening again. Tina… Tina. It’s the little barbs that get me, the way she sees Bette… and even Angie. Bette is always put together, at peace, in a good place with Angie. Like those are qualities that they should apologize for. Run Bette. Find Maya. And Tina? For the love, listen to BiBi and get some help. I love this writing style, the descriptions, the little way each scene is laid out. And like I said before, I admire that you can post so quickly and get so many of us talking about what you wrote. I am anxiously chewing my popcorn hoping for some much needed healing for Tina.

    3. This is another good chapter with some unusual twist. A surprise that Bette got up and went to the guest room to sleep. Good for her…. no sense in torturing herself….

      I am surprised that Tina recognizes that she has been harsh with Bette and mean spirited in such a cruel manner. Most people with depression do not recognize the symptoms of their depression nor do they recognize when they are being cruel and hurtful toward others. And with Tina, she evidently has been depressed for a long time, so her behavior has become pretty routine….. except maybe when she is with Angie or Carrie. Perhaps she recognizes that which comes out of her mouth and no relationship to that which she is thinking…. certainly not an endearing quality for a person to have.

      The mind blowing statement from Angie for me was that Tina herself was her primary priority. Followed by the conclusion that to solve Tina’s problems, she runs… and then when she finds someone who she believe to be her ideal partner, she mimics her behavior when around them. Yet, she indicated to Angie, she left in a quest to find herself and now what she labels as peace. And Angie all but says “How is that working for ya?” And Tina knows in her very soul that Angie is not wrong and says so. Angie may not have all the details or the whys, but her experiences with Tina and the sanitized explanation given by Bette (which Tina heard all of ), lead Angie to conclude exactly what she said. A really amazing conversation. Would have taken a therapist about a year to get that out on the table.

      Now did we read that Tina found Carrie and possibly cheated on Bette? If so, no wonder, Bette is so felt so helpless as Tina was ending their relationship. No wonder Bette started the conversation with Angie that this was Tina’s story to tell. But then, why would she ever volunteer to give them an engagement party?

      This should be one of the most revealing conversation Tina has ever had in her life in that it tells her in words exactly what her child feels about her mother and the life she has chosen to live. And yet she still lack the very quality of life she has been searching for – peace.

      My admiration to Bette for remaining silent when I know she had a hundred questions she would like answers to. That was real self-control. Hopefully, she will get her opportunity sometime in the future.

      As to the conversation with Angie and Bette? Wow…. When Angie speaks everyone listens…. she is a courageous young woman and cuts to the chase and is at the goal line in full force. This has to be like a meteorite striking Tina right in the solar plexus.

      This chapter was raw and painful to go through… but it sure identified some of the problems….

      Thanks for the chapter, would like to see what is next….

    4. Thank you for the chapter!

      At least Angie has a “balls” to speak the truth about this Tina.

      Because even for me, as in most cases as member of pro-Tina’s team, hard not just love, but even like this version of Tina for now

      Interesting what Tina will do next

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