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Uncharted Territory
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‘Thank you.’
She must have walked into the bedroom while I was sleeping. Her clothes from last night are replaced by a dark green woolen dress, simple but elegant and her hair is half up half down, that only softens her already soft features. She is beautiful. After taking a bite of her croissant she picks up the paper and automatically hands me the cultural quire. Now hiding behind the paper I can freely study her. The way she bites the inside of her cheek while reading the paper, both hands wrapped around her coffee mug, no matter if it’s winter or summer, and the way I can read on her face if she agrees to the political opinion or not, it’s all coming back to me. She used to tell me that I am all about grand gestures, I wish I could tell her I figured out by now that life is about these small futile things in life. It are these simple mornings, the scent of her on the pillow, her clothes hanging on the chair, having breakfast while reading the paper, that matter. If she would ask for a divorce I know for sure I would never search for anyone else, because no other woman could replace all this. Many couples try to be friends after a break-up, but I just know I can’t with Tina. I could never watch her from the sidelines, getting over me, meeting someone new and moving on. And I know she can make someone really happy. Perhaps I’m selfish and of course I want her to be happy. Just not happier than with me. ‘What are you thinking about?’ Another one of those small things, that you take for granted when you’re together for years, the other knows you through and through.
‘You.’ I answer as I pick up my coffee mug to hide my thoughts for her searching eyes, only to discover that I already emptied my mug. ’Where did you sleep?’
‘In the chair next to Renee’s bed.’ She picks up the coffee mugs and the sound of the coffee grinder fills the kitchen. While waiting for the coffee to brew she fidgets with her wedding ring nervously, with a small frown between her brows and my instinct tells me to prepare. But still her words take me off guard. ‘I have been thinking. Why don’t you stay here?’
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Good chapter , thank you!
But i have a question – how Bette find out about cheating. Tina told her, but for what reason – she just told her by herself, or Bette somehow find out and confronted Tina?
Hey, Tina immediately went home to tell Bette. She wasn’t hiding or sneaking around.
Okay, there is the apology from Tina for the act….. So what next?
Once again…. perhaps they can talk without using leading questions….. perhaps they can each describe how they saw their life the months preceding the incident…. Stop assuming what is going on in the other’s mind…. allow them to tell you what their thoughts are…..
Why was Tina “at her weakest” ?
Oh, and I find the BetteisBetter that she would rather have a partner have a one night stand than to treat her like Bette treated Tina – to be absolutely toxic….. At the moment all we have is that Bette may have been unavailable during the period of time before the Tina’s cheating. We see that Tina has no idea what Bette’s perception of life was – therefore we have no confidence that Tina is representing Bette behavior objectively. Tina appears to be the least objective person in this story….. and no matter how emotionally and physically Bette was not available, that does not excuse Tina from having sex with some other than her wife. That is the classic response from someone in an abusive relationship – “I cheated because you left me no choice OR because your behavior made me do it OR its what I needed to do to get your attention. OR because of your behavior, that is what you deserve.” – Those are extremely toxic responses.
That’s ok. Everyone has their own morals and values in life right. I respect your opinion without needing to put a label of judgment to it.
Not to beat a dead horse but it is quite clear that your intent is to excuse Tina’s infidelity. Going right home and telling Bette changes nothing. Actually makes it worse. In the original series Bette never tried to deny Candace even though all Tina saw was a look and swiping hands. Honesty changes nothing. Bette was at her lowest point during that time in the series. They had lost their baby. Tina shut her out. Bette’s job was on the line. These are not excuses. In your story Tina was supposedly upset at Bette’s work schedule. No comparison. And even if there were comparisons no excuse. You are literally trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. Martha is correct. No matter what you try to do it just won’t fit. Sorry, desperate, low point, only one time etc. There is no foundation of trust at all. And the easy cheating? Very degrading to lesbians. Very stereotypical. And Tina remains so hostile and Bette is broken. This Bette and this Tina need to divorce. Just my observation.
This story has such a lovely premise – reunited to deal with the slow death of a loved one, Bette and Tina are faced with the consequences and demise of their own marriage and relationship. A highly emotional and stressful life event that has to impact their reactions to seeing each other again. And I am drawn in to the wasted time, the minutes that tick by as they stand in the same room yet miles apart simply because one can not – or will not – own her cruel behavior and the other won’t speak to how she feels. This chapter was a baby step in the right direction. I am curious as to what Bette will do. There hasn’t been a lot of kindness extended until the glimpses of it in this chapter, and Tina seems to be holding on to a whole lot of self righteous anger. The wording and writing in this story is very well done and clearly has sparked comments from readers in defense of the one cheated on. I remain cautiously optimistic but if Bette was my friend I would tell her not to stay in the apartment but to carve out time to spend together talking, healing, listening. With Renee failing each day there may not be enough time to reach a point where they can even begin to think about having a relationship again.
Hey BK. After reading your reply I realize that part of my reaction really is the negative depiction of lesbians. Lesbians cheat. No big deal. Get over it. It’s the same negative stereotyping taking place in Gen Q. Infidelity is the breaking of a solemn promise, an unbreakable bond. Why was it so easy for Tina to cheat? Why didn’t she talk to Bette? Very troublesome.
Thanks for the post. I would like to see them both in the Apartment It may encourage more discussion and mean that they share the caring more jointly.
Look forward to more
SG