“Not even with Molly?”, Carmen moved a step closer. 

Shane let go a defeated little laugh.

“No, not even with her”, she looked up at Carmen, who was closer now, “With nobody else, actually”, she repeated, for good measure. 

She saw Carmen swallow at those words and wondered – am I saying the right thing? Are we getting closer? Because I know I need to feel closer to her, to you. 

Then Carmen’s hand was resting on her cheek. Shane snuggled her face into Carmen’s palm and kissed it, the tension between them growing, pulsing, palpitating, the silence into Shane’s ears suddenly deafening. 

“Can’t we just be friends again? Like, real friends?”, Carmen asked in a thin voice. 

Shane’s stomach dropped. She knew Carmen was feeling the same things she was feeling. She knew Carmen was feeling the tension, the desire, the same powerful pull she was feeling – but she wasn’t acting on it. 

“Of course we can”, Shane smiled softly and covered Carmen’s hand with her own and kissed it again, “I really want you in my life, Carmen”. 

It was happening again, Shane realized suddenly. The thing that had happened between her and Jenny, that stepping up and then stepping back, moving back and forth, in a kind of dance. Friends, lovers, and then friends again. Only, this time she didn’t want that. She didn’t want to be Carmen’s friend. Or better, she did want to be Carmen’s friend – best friend, really, and confidant – but at the same time she also wanted to be Carmen’s lover, Carmen’s love, Carmen’s everything. 

Carmen smiled, so softly – and Shane looked away.

“So…”, Carmen tilted her head, “…Promise you aren’t going to run away from me anymore?”. 

Shane chuckled, even though the tension between the two of them hadn’t disappeared. 

“I never ran away from you”.

Carmen hid her smile by biting her bottom lip, a gesture that Shane would find extremely sexy – irresistible really.

“Oh yes you did”. 

“No, never”, Shane acted offended and held Carmen at the wrist, pulling her in so that their bodies were just inches away. 

“Stop playing dumb with me, Shane. Do you really think that I’m blind?”, Carmen’s eyes smiled. 

“I only think you’re not an eagle”, Shane replied cockily, and this time it was Carmen’s turn to act offended.