“People die all the time, Chris,” she said softly. “And I don’t mean to sound callous. Far from it. That much I’ve learned over the past couple of months. And you know what else I’ve learned? Death is the same for someone who knows he or she is going to die as it is for a pair of the kindest, most loving people I know – aside from you – who didn’t expect to die.”

I knew I had to let this play out completely, and, more importantly, face-to-face. Her words now were far more relevant to us than she could have expected. So I sat up. She reluctantly let me go.

We faced each other, and held hands.

She continued, “Do you know what I was thinking when you and that guy you were seeing at that time found me in the elevator?”

I shook my head.

“Silkworms and moths,” she answered her own question with a smile.

I looked at her with new understanding.

“About how the silkworm doesn’t really die and instead transforms into a moth? But the moth dies after it lays its eggs, right?” I asked softly.

Tears flowed from her eyes and bathe her cheeks. As I did that awful night more than two months ago, I gently wiped her tears off of her face with my thumbs.

This time, she kissed my palms, and held them against her face.

“Long ago, when I was a child, my grandmother, who I’d been close to, died, and I resisted learning that lesson,” Aerin said after a few minutes.

“But when my parents died during that accident, in such a blindingly unexpected manner, through your kindness, and those of others, I opened myself up to that world. I’ve changed, Chris. I don’t know if I’ve become a butterfly, or a moth, but I know that when my parents’ lives were shut and bolted behind death’s door, their spirits slowly emerged from there.”

“If they were the silkworm in this analogy I would argue that they didn’t die in the accident, not really, because their spirits became a part of me. And will now live in me.”

She drew closer and kissed me tenderly.

And then she drew back and whispered, “I don’t want to stay bolted behind my door, shut out from the world, Chris. I want to live, and I want their spirits to live on in me. I want to live out the rest of my life, however long that will be, connected to life. And this will only work if I’m connected to you, Chris. Because my life – and their spirit – isn’t the same when you’re not with me, I know that much, too.”