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    Backstory ~ Chapter Six

    Story written on November 7, 2008 by Spumoni.
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    Number of Comments: 13
    Words: 4415
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=71555
    Author Notes:

    “I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, “Get the hell off my property.”” ~ Joan Rivers

     

    "T, what’s the matter?"

     

    "I tried so hard."

     

    "I’m sure you did," Bette soothed.  "What did you try?"

     

    "They just wouldn’t listen to me."

     

    "Are you sure they weren’t listening?"

     

    "They didn’t try hard enough."

     

    "Okay.  What didn’t they try hard enough?"

     

    "I spent a whole day working with them."

     

    "I’m sure you did," Bette soothed some more.  "What were you trying to get them to do, T?"

     

    "I was trying to get them potty-trained but they wouldn’t cooperate."

     

    With great effort, Bette suppressed her laughter, "Tell me what happened, T."

     

    "They are ruining the whole house and they don’t care. They don’t make mess in their own den.  Well, this is my den and they don’t respect it."

     

    "T, they seemed pretty upset when I just came in the house."

     

    "They can’t get their aim right, so they can’t use the toilet bowl.  No matter what way I turned them, no matter how we twisted around or shifted positions, it wouldn’t work."

     

    "Maybe it’s anatomical, T."

     

    From the doorway, they heard Angelica, in a small voice, suggest "Maybe we need a special wolf potty chair.  Like I used when I was littler."

     

    Tina and Bette looked at their little girl, who had slipped in through the door that Bette had left ajar.

     

    "T., Angelica makes a good point.  Little human children need special equipment.  Maybe wolves do, too."

     

    "Great, Bette, and where are we supposed to find this special equipment?"

     

    "I don’t know, T.," Bette replied levelly, refusing to acknowledge Tina’s sarcasm.  "Zoos must have the same problem.  Circuses too.  Maybe I can find something on the Internet."

     

    "And what do we do until then?"

     

    "I’ll clean up, Mamas," Angelica began to cry.  "Please don’t make them leave."

     

    Tina was chastened by her little girl’s fear.  "Angie, we’re not going to make them leave.  We’ll just have to figure something out."

     

    And Bette did, setting up a complicated series of ramps, sheets of tub enclosures at angles that corrected for inaccurate aim and thick plastic tarps.  She attached to the flush lever a thick rope with a wolf-mouth sized knot at its end.

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    Comments

    1. Tina is so right. It is hilarious that Bette is living with 11 wolves. Is it time to bring Alice in? It would freak her out to see Bette sitting on the sofa with a wolf!!

    2. I can’t seem to say this enough,I love this story. I have a Chow and a Collie and the are so sweet. when I go to the back yard.one will stop at the gate until the other one makes a run arounf the yard to make sure no on is aroung the runs and get on the picnic table so I can pet them. Not in my home tho. Love Bette in this and Tina trying to Potty train them The great hunter by very grumpie. Doesnt sound like our Bette thanks

    3. Spumoni, you have indeed lost it, you are around the bend, but this is such an awesome fic! You rock! In wolfspeak, that might sound something like yipyipgrawlsnort! I must say though that Mama is right on by pointing out that for someone NOT used to it, meaning Bette, it might be quite trying at times to live with 11 non toilet trained wolves,yet she is doing her best, and Tina doesn’t seem to show her much understanding or appreciation of this, or that she is an excellent hunter. Hey I am cranky even when I am NOT living with 11 wolves! Is this post making your foot thump on the floor or are you dancing with your nose in the air like Snoopy? Oh, I imagine Angelica is Pinky’s Cub?

    4. ‘Unless her adult career is going to be hunting for Yeti, wolf speak will not prove to be useful.” – ha! – (Maybe she could catch one and name it after Mama B – YetiBetty? ;-)

    6. Oh yeah I forgot about the howling! Wouldn’t the neighbors kind of ..notice that loud and weird sounds, alot of loud and weird sounds, are coming from a formerly quiet home, alot? I also wondered if Angelica wanted to eat her meat raw like her cousins.

    8. Yes, that too. Bette said that she was going to gut the bathroom after they left, but I think she might as well gut the whole house, as wasn’t it said that they were messing everywhere? I shudder to think of everything that would become very smelly very quickly.. the food, the fur, the…Ha, I bet Melvin is looking REALLY good to Tina by now! So is Tina’s next job to teach them how to take baths? You have done it now, Spumoni..we are all off on this flight of fancy witchoo!

    9. This is hilarious and I am enjoying every minute of it. “Unless her adult career is going to be hunting for Yeti, wolf speak will not prove to be useful.” That was “careening off the wall” funny, narly fell off the chair laughing. Too funny for words, yet there is a moral in this tale. I love it.

    11. Awwwwww, Pinky’s beloved, sooooo sweet. I think Bette’s trying really hard to accept the family. Funny that they wouldn’t try to eat her because she has no meat on her bones! You’re a funny lady. PPS!!

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