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Christmas with the Kennards- Chapter 4
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“Mom, why do you keep these?” Tina said as she hung a gingerbread man that she had made in the first grade. “Maybe it’s time you got new ones?”
“Fiddlesticks, Tina!” Donna waived her of quickly. “That would be like giving up my Christmas sweater, or my position as chairperson of the annual Christmas play at church.”
“Shit!”
Each woman turned in the direction of the door leading to the outside. Bette’s voice was clearly laced with frustration as she worked to center the Christmas wreaths where Donna had placed them last year.
“It looks like there isn’t a spare inch on the house for another decoration and we’ve only been through 2 crates.”
“They’ll be out there a while,” Donna said, chuckling as Dana refilled her own glass of eggnog. “They still have to put all the moving figures together and display them on the lawn.”
The clatter made the majority of the women cringe inside, waiting for the obvious declaration of unhappiness.
“What the hell?”
Tina laughed as she picked up another ornament, ignoring Bette’s angry voice. She studied the lopsided tree and quickly looked away when her sentimental tears sprung to life.
“So what did you get Bette for the holidays?” Donna asked casually as she spread out the ornaments a now tipsy Dana clumped together.
“We decided to go small this year,” Tina said casually as she hung another ornament. “The trip was our big present to one another.”
“You have to have more than that!”
“I got her a few things for the gallery that she wanted,” Tina elaborated, ignoring the shocked look that Donna gave her.
“The gallery?”
“Well she dropped a few hints over the past year.”
“You need something more,” Donna said as she grabbed her lesbian reference manual.
“What are you possibly going to find in there?” Tina asked quickly. “I have no intention of discussing anything in that book. How could you even be suggesting that we buy…”
“What did she suggest?” Dana asked as she covered her mouth a moment too late to contain her hiccup.
“Tina, I’m not going to suggest you buy a shmeckle.”
“A what?”
“Bless you,” Dana said snorting as another round of Elvis carols began to play on the surround sound system.
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I like that last comment from another story right? If not ignore this comment. Meanwhile Lu and I are going to do our Christmas shopping, you can say we are finally coming up for air, she is an animal, good thing I have all this energy for her. Give my regards to Sally.
OMG….I thought of your story tonight as the family decorated Christmas cookies and we put on Christmas Vacation. Your story is cracking my just as much as that damn movie. Maybe you should have Bette kick the crap out of a plastic Santa and reindeer. Thank you for this story. pps
There is so much to love about this story and chapter….but the last wolves comment….Priceless
Great post!! This is so funny. PPS
yes, wolves would be easier as far as decorations but maybe you should read spumoni’s story LOL great update, it totally put me into christmas spirit, especially since i have to work the whole time
lol…too funy
nice update there will Bette see why the lights aint working?ihope she sorts it
really love this! its one of those fuzzy wuzzy stories :) can’t wait for the next chapter!
Love this story and that last page was a corker. So funny. Someone asked why Tina is so sad, I think it is because Bette initially did not want to be there and that has colored the entire trip. And to have brought the gang to Carolina was not something she wanted to do. The wolf comment was hilarious. PPS
Sound like my house,we started in Nov.We have a full size mangrt with sheeps camel and the donkey wise men sheep/ a12 ft sled that 4 can set in also all the reindeers. 199 little snowmen to put around the sidewalk with lights, 8″ snow man and a full size[for little children can go into 3″ elvies abd lots of large candy canes. So yes my laye husband and I maded them all her cut I painted. This will be my last yr as I will past it on to G/G kids. So I do feel sorry for bette. what is wrong with Tina Tina Mom is something else and Our Dana oh how we loved her. Have a wonderful Holiday and New Year thanks
Freaking genius !!!
THE WOLF REFERENCE!! HAHAHA ohhhand i love Dane and her eggnog! =0) Thanks for another great post. can’t wait for your next!
OMG THAT WAS SO FUNNY!
Certainly a fantastic update. Can’t wait for more
Fabulous update….especially liked the comment by Bette about the wolf dens. Thanks again. pps.
LMFAO :-) this story is so funny. Love the wolf comment. PPS :-)
That was incredibly funny and fun to read too, you are the queen of comedy my dear lovely Gamby and I am so excited about your story and all the moments we get to witness while the story unfold. Thank you so much for writing this story in a beautiful season like this and I wish you a very happy holiday. Love
Woot! for the ‘wolves’ reference!!! Lovin’ it! Just Lovin’ it!!! PPS!
That was sooo funny. Thanks!
ROFL love the wolves referrence, hahaha.. lol. :)PPS
This reminds me why Dana is so missed. Absolutely hilarious, Gumby! Poor Bette will need more than spiked eggnog to make it through the Kennard family Christmas. I can’t wait for the presents…especially since Donna went “all out”! I’m envisioning a Christmas sweater embroidered with “If it doesn’t taste good, spit it out”.
Poor Bette all that work and no lights. Whats up with Tina? So Love your writting. Thank you Gumby
why was/is Tina sad?? PPS!!!
OK so I’m waiting for someone to enter a room and flip the magic switch for the lights to come on! lol Christmas at the kennards sounds just as intense as they are at my house. PPS
LOL – Amazing story. Pure Bette – so many lights to check – ROLF.