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    THANKSGIVING FROM helL

    Story written on November 26, 2006 by Lamentamini.
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    1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 (1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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    Genre(s):
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    Character(s): , , ,
    Number of Comments: 17
    Words: 4643
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=63356
    Author Notes:

    It’s late, and the title is lame. *maybe a bit spoilerish* It’s an ensemble story with some Sharmen and some TiBette-like moments. Inspired by an episode of Jerry Springer I saw over 10 years ago.

    Carmen smiled and kissed Shane’s lips. Shane, for the first time in a long time, gave Carmen a real smile back. She leaned in and softly took Carmen’s lips in her own, easing her tongue into Carmen’s mouth.

    "I miss you Shane, so much," Carmen whispered into Shane’s mouth.

    "You know I missed you," Shane whispered back and helped Carmen to her feet then wrapped her arms around Carmen and kissed her again with full force.

    Carmen’s lips left Shane’s and made a trail down her neck as she unbutton Shane’s shirt. Shane’s hands made their way to the zipper on Carmen’s dress and unzipped it with ease. She pushed it off of Carmen and cupped Carmen’s bra-covered breasts in her hands.

    "Oh my God! Take me, Shane! Take me now!"

    Outside the bathroom…

    Helena approached the bathroom door and heard loud moaning coming from the other side. ‘Well, at least someone is having a good Thanksgiving,’ she thought with a giggle. She slowly opened the door with her eyes closed.

    Helena cleared her throat. "Um, ladies, I hate to break up this lovefest, but we have a problem."

    Shane and Carmen’s eyes had grown wide at the sound of Helena’s voice and they quickly started putting their clothes back together.

    "What’s going on?" Carmen asked.

    "Let’s just say that when Kit said she was throwing a Thanksgiving feast, I don’t think she meant it in the literal sense," Helena replied.

    "Oh shit!" Shane said then whispered in Carmen’s ear. "We’ll finish this at a more opportune time."

    Carmen quickly kissed Shane. "I’ll hold you to that."

    The three women swiftly exited the bathroom to face the elementary school-style war.

    Angus had taken Angelica away from the pandemonium and kept her company in Kit’s office while everyone else was busy going through a second childhood with food and insults flying from everyone direction.

    "You fucking CHEATED!" Tina yelled and tossed a chicken leg at Bette.

    "And your solution was to fuck a light version of me and then run off to find a dick!" Bette hurled back along with a handful of stuffing.

    "That beard is such a joke!" Jenny hollered while chucking green beans.

    "And your carnival stories are too fucking stupid!" Max lamely replied and went to throw a big scoop of mashed potatoes toward Jenny, but she ducked and it hit Shane instead.

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    Comments

    1. That definately was the lesbian episode of Jerry Springer. I can imagine all of them throwing food at each other… and Max’s comments about Jenny was so on point. If only IC had a sense of humor and instead of this being S4 we’d get a treat in January and will premier the REAL S3. Since she has no heart, no writing style or sense of humor, we’ll have to sit through another gut-wrenching, poorly written episodes, BETTY, lack of character development and stolen story lines from Queer as Folk.

    2. ok roflmao that was sooooooooo funny and yet sooooooooo good, i loved the sharmen in it and the fact they worked it out I can only hope it turns out that way on the show … i loved this fic and i think you should keep going with it it was written so well and i thought you captured all of the characters perfectly . I loved it and couldnt stop smiling while i red it way to go and please keep it up …

    3. Lament that was a hoot. I could actually see this happening. It reminds me of the good times in season 1. Tina is the only one who knows for sure that it was Angelica that started all the mayhem. Kudos to Kit for attempting to get her family back on the same page.

    7. Lamentamini, I’ve always been a silent reader of your stories. This time, though, I couldn’t help but say something. This was hilarious to me! We could only hope that S4 would turn out like this!!! Great job and can’t wait for the next installment of this and Milestones.

    8. I’m glad people enjoyed this. I had to go back and fix some glaring typos and also to leave a comment of my own. When I read this all the way through just now, I realized how wrong it was for Max to throw ham at Jenny with her being Jewish and all. LMFAO

    9. O.o food fight..lol…when you mentioned Jerry I thought you’re going to have a “Who’s your daddy?” kind of theme lmao..I’m sure the ham incident will not be use against you in anyway:) This was fun. Thanks!

    10. “Rating Disabled By Author”? What!? Well, I’m gonna give you five stars anyway. * * * * * (Heh, way to beat the system, bum. Way to beat the system [pats herself on the back])

    12. Great story. You did a fantastic job at conveying the pain and loss Shane feels because of the incident in Canada. It was good to clear the air between Carmen and Shane, finally Carmen knows why Shane did what she did and they could move on from that mistake. (I’m a Sharmen fan, can you tell? LOL) I even liked some of the non-Sharmen lines and tidbits, like Bette and Tina’s thoughts as Kit said grace, or Kit admitting that she was throwing food too. Awesome dinner!

    13. lol…Lament where do you get this stuff from? Well written I must say and I hope it leads to a real conversation between Bette & Tina. That whole table had some issues (even Angelica…lol)

    14. Bringing up the rear here! Great story, as always, Lament! Yeah–I couldn’t believe that ham was thrown at Jenny, either! lol Loved the dialogue, which remained true to the characters. Love that Angelica for being such an accurate pitcher! Maybe she’ll play softball one day! Sorry I’m reading this so late–hope you decide to do a Christmas update!

    16. ohh, this was so hilarious.. Thanks for posting. LOL at Bette and Tina’s thoughts when Kit was saying grace, somehow they were still on the same page, in a weird way =))

    17. HahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahHHahhahahahhahahahahahhahahhhahhhhahahhahahahhahahahahaha that’s all I can do…sigh that was great, my kind of comedy

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