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    Uncharted Territory

    Story written on January 12, 2022 by BetteisBetter.
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    9 votes, average: 4.33 out of 59 votes, average: 4.33 out of 59 votes, average: 4.33 out of 59 votes, average: 4.33 out of 59 votes, average: 4.33 out of 5 (9 votes, average: 4.33 out of 5)
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    Genre(s): , , ,
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    Character(s): , , ,
    Number of Comments: 8
    Words: 3213
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=112558
    Author Notes:

     ‘I can’t.’  ‘Can you live with more regrets?’ She asks and through my tears the empty crib stares back at me.  ‘She will never forgive me.’  ‘Do you want her to forgive you? Then go there and be for her what you always wanted to be.’ Still on the threshold she reaches out her hand

     ‘I can’t.’

     ‘Can you live with more regrets?’ She asks and through my tears the empty crib stares back at me.

     ‘She will never forgive me.’

     ‘Do you want her to forgive you? Then go there and be for her what you always wanted to be.’ Still on the threshold she reaches out her hand to me. ‘Come, I know for sure you don’t want to miss the flight, not this one.’

     

    ‘Bette.’ When I blink Tina crouches down next to the couch, her eyes filled with nothing but concern. I must have fallen asleep. Days after a migraine attack I’m always a little weary. I shouldn’t have eaten that chocolate Maddy offered me and cost me this migraine – but I just can’t say no to her. ‘Did you have a bad dream?’

    Throwing the blanket, that she must have covered me with, off of me I fly up from the couch. Away from those concerned eyes and away from something that I wish was just a bad dream. ‘Shouldn’t you be at work? You’re here for days already.’ I snap a little too harsh.

    ‘Do you want to be alone?’

    Without answering I walk over to the window and open it. The fresh air and the steady street view can’t bring me back to the present. What is the present actually, that I so desperately want to go back to? Do I want to go back to dragging the intended mother of my child through Paris on her walk of shame. We were doing fine. Do I find fine going back to sleepovers with my own wife? Or back to feeling sorry for myself and being angry at the whole world? When I turn around she’s just there. Concerned. Frightened even. And remorseful… still. Is this what I want to go back to?

    So blinded by my own struggles and doubts and later so consumed with my own pain I failed to see hers. Of course I knew it was there, how could I not, we shared the same dreams after all. But she was always so fearless, always so put together, I liked to believe that she was ok. Because when she’s ok, I’m ok too. More than ok. I glance at her. Ok does not look exhausted and pale, Ok does not skip sleep for days. More than ok and fine smiles and beams like when we bought that crib.

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    Comments

    1. Thank you for the chapter!

      First i was afraid this chapter it’s another self-pity Bette’s party, but second half of chapter with Bette and Teddy bear fix it.

    3. I got a lump in my throat after reading this story.

      Bette who brought back old memories that were so painful but also gave her insight into her emotional state at the time.

      Both Bette and Tina have done things wrong in their relationship such as discussing what they feel and want, what they are afraid of. And now they are both bombarded with a feeling of guilt, a feeling that they must work on together and individually.
      Bette has already taken the first small step by talking and giving the teddy bear to Tina.

      It takes time to get their relationship back to normal, let them take that time but make sure they do good and fun things so that they also have a positive feeling or memory in the time when things are a bit more difficult.

      A great story!

    4. B

      This story is a lost gem. I began it when you started it, but life and all, well I forgot about it. I came across it yesterday and began rereading.

      You beautifully capture the emotional drift, longing, loneliness and most def guilt. Tina has her guilt it is tangible. It was a bad choice and act that she can put her finger on, but Bette…. Her guilt is more subtle, deep in the layers of time. It was a gradual act, one that is not easily recognized. Having her come to realize it and put it out there, taking blame for her part in all the mess.

      So well written.

      K

    5. This story is so much more then just ff. It’s more like a novel. Tibette is portrayed more as real people then just that perfect couple that no one sees in real life. It’s breathtakingly beautiful. So many times I had lump in my throat reading it. So many times I was just speachless. Thank you for taking your time to write such wonderful story. I really can’t wait for more.

    7. I’m so inconsistent when I comment other people’s story but this one is very special to me. I’m still heartbroken over chapter 16 and only one other story ever made me feel that way. It was “…the eternal rocks beneath…”, also on LesFan.

      I don’t know if you have any plans to ever post the next chapters, but if you do, gosh I would fall at your feet with gratitude. This story is way too good to be left unfinished.

      • Hi Cam,

        Of course we’re going to finish it. Just life took over for a little while. This story is too dear to us, to not finish it. Thank you and everyone else for your great comments and support. Truly appreciated!

        Just have a little more patience.. we will be back soon and do our best not to dissapoint!

        Have a nice weekend.

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