James: Bette! I know you’re in there I saw your car parked outside and in the handicap space I might add! Open the door!

Bette: [continues to stare at the ceiling]

James: [now banging on the door] Open the door Bette! Bette!? Really, like I can’t hear R.E.M “Everybody Hurts” blasting from the radio!!!!

Bette: [rolled over to her side]

James: Okay, fine just remember you forced me to do this!!!!!!

Bette: [grabbed a nearby pillow and put it over her head] Hoping to drown out James she wanted to be left alone to wallow in her misery, but he had other plans and it was evident when she heard a sudden buzzing noise. Now, curious she rolls over and sees a medium sized drill bit penetrate the key lock. When the door eventually swung open she stared nonchalantly at him.

James: [storming in] Have you lost your mind! Why are you holed up in here like some mole rat!????? [he says before turning off the radio]

Bette: [sitting up confusingly stares at him] Why, are you wearing that Friday the 13th mask it’s February?

James: [lifting the mask to speak] It’s called a welding mask Mrs. Ivy League! Now, do you want to tell me just what in the hell is going on!?

Bette: Nothings going on.

James: Have you been washing your fruit before you eat it?

Bette: I’m not in the mood for your smart ass comments James.

James: Clearly, [he stares at her awkwardly] you’re not in the mood to properly dress yourself either and if it was actually against the law I’d call the fashion police and have you thrown in jail!

Bette: [laying back down on her side]

James: [shaking his head while staring down at her] This is worse than when I played truth or dare at this party when I was younger and this cute girl I liked dared me to go home—I haven’t played since.

Bette: [rolls her eyes at him]

James: It doesn’t take a genius to figure out you and Tina had a fight.

Bette: How did you know!?

James: Because the last time I saw you like this was in 2012 when that Kelley came into town hoping to test out your gag reflexes!