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    1 Tina

    Story written on August 13, 2023 by BetteisBetter.
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    5 votes, average: 3.80 out of 55 votes, average: 3.80 out of 55 votes, average: 3.80 out of 55 votes, average: 3.80 out of 55 votes, average: 3.80 out of 5 (5 votes, average: 3.80 out of 5)
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    Genre(s): , ,
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    Character(s): , , ,
    Number of Comments: 6
    Words: 8328
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=115420
    Author Notes:

    ’In the rain?’ ’I don’t mind it.’ I replied as the elevator doors slid open and we walked into the long corridor. The walls were adorned with the standard pictures of sea views that Bette would patronizingly dismiss as cheap hotel art. In front of her room Kate stopped. ’Would you like a drink?’ She

    ’In the rain?’

    ’I don’t mind it.’ I replied as the elevator doors slid open and we walked into the long corridor. The walls were adorned with the standard pictures of sea views that Bette would patronizingly dismiss as cheap hotel art.

    In front of her room Kate stopped. ’Would you like a drink?’ She motioned at the door, her key card ready in her hand. There was something about her lopsided smile under the dimmed light of the wall lamp that told me I had a choice not to be alone tonight. For a split second it seemed so appealing.

    Slowly I shook my head. ’Good night Kate.’

    Attentively the housekeeping had left the small light on the night stand on. Somewhere I read that dog owners often leave the TV on when they leave the house, so their pets wouldn’t feel alone. I turned the TV on and muted it. The flashy images created a play of shadows and light drawings on the walls and ceiling while I slowly undressed myself. The cotton rasped against my bare skin as I slid under the covers. Closing my eyes I imagined Bette’s hands, the soft skin, slender fingers, strong. The way they felt on me, the way they could provide relief.

    Turning my head aside I wished the dunes wouldn’t block the sound of waves rhythmically rolling onto shore, like one of those sleep meditation recordings. In Paris at least there were the sounds of the night. Honking cars, sirens, drunken laughter, homeless people yelling, dogs barking. Here was nothing that could sooth me except for my own hands. I groaned and reached for my phone.

    Tina: Can I give Tom your number? He needs advice on pregnancy massages.

    Bette: No.

    Bette: Are you ok?

    Tina: Fine.

    Bette: What exactly did he want?

    Tina: His girlfriend is 16 weeks pregnant. It’s a girl.

    Bette: typing…

    It appeared and re-appeared, appeared and re-appeared, appeared and re-appeared and then she went offline.

    Tina: I wish you were here to hold me. I miss you so much still, it hurts. I held the delete button until the field was blank and the screen turned black. The ringtone finally broke the silence and her caller ID re-lid the screen.

    I muted it and tossed it aside.

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    Comments

    1. Hey ladies,

      Welcome back!

      I do remember Renee and the story of last year. I totally loved that one but this rewrite is catching my interest as well.

      My heart is breaking for Bette and Tina, i want to cry for them and hope and wish they will find the love they once had.

      And Renee being so sick, no cure possible. The catalist for Bette returning to Paris.

      I’m looking forward to read the other parts.

    2. A re-write? I’m curious to see what you’ve changed. I loved it the first time around and was waiting for an update.
      Well, I’m off to reading now. :-)

    3. I was exciting seeing the tittle (not knowing of the meaning of 2.0 was). read the story eagerly, thinking it was another chapter of the other story. but then I read, Renee is still alive? hmm.. must be a past story, then.. I thought.. hmm.. it’s weird, the storyline seems different from the one without 2.0.
      then I read Author Note, I should have read it sooner… hehehehe.. (so sorry.. I didn’t read the author note from the beginning because how eager I was to read it) so it is different story, with almost the same background .. and now I wonder what is the difference from the other one? well… my impression reading this one is less bitterness, a lot of stubbornness from both side,, and that makes me wonder what happened with them?

      I love both stories, and can’t wait for the next one.. and thank you for sharing your work with us..

    5. I must say that this story is rather confusing to me… As you have no introduction into any background on this story. Who is Renee? Who is “I”… what’s going on… I am sorry to say that after 3 pages I simply quit reading as I still had no clue as what I was reading. If you are depending on the reader having read another story to figure out who these people are and what is going on, then you need to say so. But your story is like waking up and finding yourself somewhere you have never been before with people you do not know and why you or they are there… With any good story… you cannot assume your reader knows anything…. you must tell the reader what they need to know to get into the story..

      I do remember your last story…. but I also remember that I had a great deal of difficulty following who was talking in your dialogue sequences… thus, I had a great deal of difficulty discerning the story line… Is this Bette talking or is it Tina? I guess some enjoy that style of story telling… I will say that I enjoyed Desert Rose far more than Uncharted Territory.

      Good luck with this one. I wish you much success…

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