Tina: Well, it is our hope that our children will find that person whom they want to live their life with and share in their life’s journey. And we hope they love each other as much as we do… and if possible, even more.

Angie:  Do you think that person is out there for each of us?

Bette:  Oh, I absolutely do. And I believe that the first person to know who that person is, will be you.

Tina: I am of the opinion is that there has to be a number of factors in place before you will know who this person is.  First you must be ready to find this person. You must have the right maturity, the right mind set and they must be in the same place emotionally. Second, you must be available for such a connection. If you are dating someone else, you won’t be looking for your one true love, no matter how perfect they are for you. And lastly: They must be ready and available as well. And no matter how you slice and dice it, it takes two to form a relationship.

Bette: And the biggest element of any relationship is that it takes work and attention by both of you. And most people have no idea what that means. After all, we live in a world of happily ever after or it fails. And the secret is, that there are no happily ever afters without a lot of time, commitment and a whole lot of communication.

Mary: Do you two ever fuss and fight?

Tina: We use to. But we learned to talk to each other and to listen to each other and to address our potential disagreements early and directly. The sooner you talk about it, the less likely it will be problem.

Bette: And we learned a long time ago, that we have to communicate with each other about absolutely everything. We cannot hold back anything just because we think the other is going to react badly or that it will result in a fuss or there will be a problem and I’ll get the blame. If you do that, your fear becomes self-fulling. There will be a fuss. There will be a problem and you will get the blame. That for me was the hardest lesson I ever had to learn. Handle things as they come along and forget about who is to blame. Assessing blame does nothing to help you solve the problem you have at hand. All that does is make people defensive, angry and emotional. Deal with what is and not what shoulda, coulda and woulda happened or if only x, y, or z had happened. How will that ever help you resolve a problem?