Upon hearing her girlfriend’s name I groan “Moira ain’t right for you. Come on Jenny. Stay. You’re not givin’ me a chance here” I say stubbornly not wanting to believe you prefer her over me. “You don’t know what you’re saying you just want to get laid” she says exasperated. Can’t you see you mean so much more to me I think sadly as I tell her “We are different You’re different. ***** I’m different. I’m not a sluty psychopath anymore.” She shakes her head once more her hand resting on the door ***** and I feel so dejected.

As she leaves I don’t hesitate to go after her and without thought trying to latch on I declare “I love you”. She laughs “Yes till the next girl comes around. I can’t do that Shane” her voice sympathetic. “That’s over. That’s not who I am anymore” I tell her, the lump in my throat keeping me from screaming. “Isn’t that convenient” she says sneering.  I feel so silly standin’ in the middle of the room spilling out my guts to her while she stands mocking my feelings, patronizing me. I can’t muster any words and am left staring at her speechless holding back unshed tears.

Jenny says “It was a mistake” and the words cause me a similar pain reaction to being gutted. I plead “Don’t say that”. I have given you all that I have. And everything you could take from me I already gave, you took it all away. Please don’t do this. I say over and over in my head. “What did you want me to say? I was drunk” Jenny says losing her temper.

I look at her straight in the eyes. “What about that kiss?” She looks away “It meant nothing” she whispers. “No, I know you felt something” I say pleadingly, grabbing her hands and pulling her closer to me. “Don’t tell me how I feel. You are so full of yourself” She said coldly to me, our lips merely inches apart, before she pulled away. “It’s confidence” I say grabbing her waist and pulling her closer once again. “Yeah, nipple confidence” She says dislodging herself from my arms.

“You can’t deny it. There is something between us” I tell her at the end of my rope. “I can’t do it. I’m afraid it will end in tears” she says softly while carefully examining the floor. My heart beats yarning holding tightly to a flick of hope and I try once again to convince you to take a shot at me. “You afraid? You shouldn’t be. CauseSo what, if nothing ever comes out of this? So what, if you’ll never act on it? You are so convinced that this relationship is going to kill you”. She places her hands on my face interrupting my speech “I heard that before. I’ve been part of one of yours relationship triangles once and look where it got me. I don’t want to be part of it again. Ok” she says sincerely and almost lovingly. “No, not ok!” I wanted to scream at her, but my voice failed so I just take one step back away from her touch.