Too often the thing you want most is the thing you cant have. Desire leaves us heart broken. It wears us out. Desire can wreck our lives. But as tough as wanting something can be… the people who suffer the most… are does who don’t know what they want

… So what do I want? I want to know what I want… I do. But I think that what I want…. is something I cant have. Don’t want to have… wanted to, but it’s just not right.

But at the moment… what I do know I want is… TEQUILA

I have an aunt who whenever she poured anything for you she would say ‘say when?’….My ant would say ‘say when’… and of course we never did…We don’t say ‘when’ cause their is something about the possibility of more. More tequila, more love, more anything. More is better.

“Another one please”

“Um, lady are you sure, I mean I think you’ve taken enough” I young woman said from behind the bar

“It’s totally fine…. Listened, listened, I know the owner… she’s my friend so pored me another shot please”

“Right…  Kit!”

“Noo, no don’t call her, she-”

“What’s wrong baby girl?” I try to hide behind my beer

“This girl says she know you, so she can have another shot… she’s at her limit”

“No its ok I don’t want it anymore” I turned around to go, so she wouldn’t recognize me.

“Carmen? Carmen that’s you?” shit… I think I’m gonna have to turn around. I do turn around with a ‘yea you got me’ look

“Oh my god Carmen!? Girl! Come here, come here” she came out of behind the bar and hugged me

“How are you?”

“I’m good, I’m good”

“Yea, I’ve heard you got married” what, wait how did-

“You-you know?”

“Yea…  Alice found out and told us” …. So Shane knows… yeah and why do I care if she knows… it is true, I am married

“Carmen?”

“Um yeah sorry, but, how are you?” when I said that I almost fell… lost my balanced a little bit