“Oh girl, are you alright? How many shots have you done already?”

“A lot….” She looked at me with sad eyes… realizing maybe that I know about Shane. We sat down at the bar.

“You came to see her?”

“Yeah”

“She’s going to be ok baby girl, she’s a fighter” when she said that, I couldn’t contain my laughter.

“It’s so funny… for the first 2 years I wanted to kill her… you know… for living me in hell… with a broken heart, hell broken life… I was in a dark place and it was all because of her… then for the 3^rd year, I hoped she was dead… for making me this person who couldn’t love… couldn’t give and for the last 2 years… I felt like as if she was dead… to me… cause I didn’t think of her… didn’t need her. And now… and now she’s dying and I just…. She can’t die, I don’t want her to die” I started crying, I couldn’t help it. Kit grabbed me and led me to her office. So we could talk. We got there and I still couldn’t talk. I felt like I’ve been holding these tears for 5 years…

“Baby girl… she is a strong motherfucker, you know that better than anyone… she is going to make it… now that you’re here… she is”

Now that I’m here? Now that I’m here what is that suppose to mean?

“She’s not been the same after….” I think she saw the look I gave her before

“…..”

“She had couple of girlfriends… but… it just wasn’t the same… do you remember one day at the planet when you brought her a drink and sat on her, then you guys kissed… and I said you looked hot together?” I had to laugh at that… just to remember something nice about us… something that wasn’t at all a big deal but still… good.

“I do” She smiles

“Girl… when she heard you got married… she um… she disappeared for two weeks… we didn’t know where she was… we were going crazy looking for that girl… and when she finally got home and we asked where the hell was she… the only thing she said was … your name… apparently she went to look for you, found you… and when she saw you… she left”