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Private Duty—Chapter 2
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”I’m so happy you are ok. I am truly sorry. I never meant to hurt you” Tina replied as tears swelled in her eyes.
”I told you that all is forgiven Tina?..Look at me please?” Bette prompted
Tina raised her head to look Bette in the eyes.
”You didn’t answer me..What can I do to help you with the guilt you are carrying?” Bette asked as she stroked Tina’s cheek with her hand.
Tina shook her head not knowing the answer to that question.
”Bette. I don’t know. There is so much going on in my head now after our talk and I need some time to get it all straight” Tina said pointing to her head.
Bette was about to speak but was interrupted by Tricia knocking and opening the front door.
”Oh sorry. Um? Tina? Matt is here to see you” Tricia announced and smiled at Bette before she walked out.
”Matt? Is that your boyfriend?” Bette asked hesitantly
”He was…But he wants a second chance and I told him I would think about it but that was before I found out you were my Elizabeth. That certainly trumps any suitor from trying to court me. I mean I don’t want to see anyone else if you were wanting maybe for us to like see each other..Maybe?” Tina rambled nervously.
”Tina? I know I would but you are still carrying around so much guilt and I think you need to work that out before we try to pursue anything” Bette said honestly but not wanting to upset Tina
Tina winced on the inside as she felt like something had pierced her heart hearing Bette’s semi-rejection. Even though Bette didn’t say she didn’t want to be with her it hurt just the same.
”So you ask me what will help get me over my guilt and I’m pretty sure me being with you will help in doing just that. Bette? I really want this and I think-well I know-that this will help me move past the guilt if I could be with you. We could take it really, really slow.” Tina confessed searching Bette’s eyes
Bette sighed and rubbed Tina’s back
”I don’t know Tina. Right now. I just think your head needs to be right before we could be together. It seems like a disaster in the making for us to start a relationship with everything weighing on you like it is. I couldn’t risk that. I couldn’t lose you again” Bette replied and tried to pull Tina closer to her but met resistance.
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Tina…Tina! Think girl…. Bette walk into your life 24 hours ago and you want her to start dating you? You want to be with her regardless of the circumstances and the fact that you feel so guilty about your actions of 20 years ago? Your way or the highway? Seems like a bit controlling and unreasonable. Being friends first sounds like a reasonable idea to me. Don’t you want to get to know this Bette…this woman who has been through so much trauma and accomplishment? Don’t you want her to know you? And to be sure that her forgiveness of your actions were well placed? Just making such a request would be seem a bit neurotic to me. Just go with the flow for a while, she going to be your mother’s live in nurse for a while. After making such a demand, some people would call the office and tell them to send another nurse. She may care for the girl you were, but she does not know the woman you are except that you are attracted to her but are feeling the guilt. What if after you have resolved your guilt problem, she does not seem so attractive any more? Hell, you’ve been a straight girl forever… are you really ready for this? Take some time to think about this…do you want to break her heart again?
Good story….cannot wait to see what happens next.
Totally agree with Martha. Not much to add. What starts in chaos ends in chaos. Take a breath, Tina. All is not black and white. It seems a little of the determined to get her own way Tina still lurks. She can’t change 20 years in five minutes. Is it love or to assuage her guilt? She can’t know. Yet. Interesting way to incorporate Alice and Shane. I like this story.
Agree with you and Martha. Tina wants to make up for lost time and “that is the “guilt” that Bette is talking about! She needs to want for Bette to really be healed from a broken heart. Hmmmm
Ditto to all of you. Tina’s reaction seemed very teenager-like but I’d say that her thoughts and emotions are all over the place after the revelation. She should go for a long walk to think, sit with her mother and tell her all of what was happening and going through her mind. Sometimes it helps to give voice to the things which are battling in the head. Grab the chance to have an honest friendship with Bette first, everything more will come naturally (or not) when the time is right.
Martha, Billy and DumplinT have captured my thoughts exactly. Tina would benefit from therapy herself to deal with the 9 year old guilt filled little girl and understand those confusing feelings before she embarks on any type of relationship with Bette or anyone. Glad she let Matt go, but she wasn’t honest with the reason why. She’s emotionally immature. I hope Bette’s sense of responsibility doesn’t push her to be with Tina prematurely. She’s got a lot of scars whether she is willing to admit it or not.
Great storyline. Looking forward to more.
On the same wavelength as Martha, Billy, Dumplin T and BAT here. This is a very nieve Tina and Bette can see it.
Love the connection between Bette and Shane and Alice and the storyline it gives us.
Looking forward to more so please post soon.
Stay safe
Agree with you about liking Shane, Alice and Bette’s friendship. She is well aware of the necessity of drawing barriers by telling S & Al that are going to have to find jobs and places of their own after graduation.
She doesn’t mind helping, but all of them need physical distance. Even Tina has an apartment as opposed to the easy option of staying in the guest house
Can´t wait for more.