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    THANKSGIVING FROM helL

    Story written on November 26, 2006 by Lamentamini.
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    1 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 51 vote, average: 5.00 out of 5 (1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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    Character(s): , , ,
    Number of Comments: 17
    Words: 4643
    Story Shortlink: https://lesfan.com/?p=63356
    Author Notes:

    It’s late, and the title is lame. *maybe a bit spoilerish* It’s an ensemble story with some Sharmen and some TiBette-like moments. Inspired by an episode of Jerry Springer I saw over 10 years ago.

    Tina: ‘Sometimes I wish Henry could watch Bette fuck me so he’d know what to do…where the hell did THAT come from?!’

    Max: ‘Where did I put my Pissin’ Passin’ Packer?’

    Jenny: ‘Maybe I’ll write fuck in my food again.’

    Helena: ‘I’m bored. The last time I was bored at a dinner I got laid. I wonder where the nearest pool is?’

    Angelica: ‘I can’t suck my big toe because I’m wearing these stupid things Mom calls shoes on my feet!’

    "Amen," Kit said. Everyone was roused from their thoughts and echoed Kit with a weak "Amen."

    After Angus carved the turkey everyone filled up their plates with food. All that was heard for the first few minutes were the sounds of people eating. ‘Well, so far so good,’ Kit thought to herself. She wasn’t expecting a miracle to happen in one night, but was hoping this dinner would bring her friends together again so they all could get past all their problems eventually.

    After about ten minutes Max spoke. "This is really good, Kit. Thanks." The rest of the group offered their thanks too, feeling a little guilty for not saying anything sooner.

    Kit, who was sitting near Max, patted his arm and smiled. "You’re welcome."

    "Really, it is. I can’t remember the last time I had a good meal."

    "Guess you haven’t found a little wifey to cook for you, huh?" Jenny mumbled while playing with her food. This time instead of writing a swearword, she made a big "LOL" with her vegetables.

    Shane was sitting beside Jenny and gently touched her hand. "Let it go," she whispered. Everyone had heard Jenny, including Max.

    "Why does it always have to be about you?" Max’s voice had risen in volume as he spoke directly to Jenny. Jenny kept her eyes fixed on her plate with a slightly annoyed look. "Why do you always have to act like some sort of a victim?"

    "She’s not the only one," Bette attempted to say under her breath but was louder than intended.

    "And just is that supposed to mean?" Tina yelled.

    "Guys! Calm down!" Helena said. "Kit was kind enough to arrange this dinner for us. Let’s try and act at least a little civilized for one evening."

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    Comments

    1. That definately was the lesbian episode of Jerry Springer. I can imagine all of them throwing food at each other… and Max’s comments about Jenny was so on point. If only IC had a sense of humor and instead of this being S4 we’d get a treat in January and will premier the REAL S3. Since she has no heart, no writing style or sense of humor, we’ll have to sit through another gut-wrenching, poorly written episodes, BETTY, lack of character development and stolen story lines from Queer as Folk.

    2. ok roflmao that was sooooooooo funny and yet sooooooooo good, i loved the sharmen in it and the fact they worked it out I can only hope it turns out that way on the show … i loved this fic and i think you should keep going with it it was written so well and i thought you captured all of the characters perfectly . I loved it and couldnt stop smiling while i red it way to go and please keep it up …

    3. Lament that was a hoot. I could actually see this happening. It reminds me of the good times in season 1. Tina is the only one who knows for sure that it was Angelica that started all the mayhem. Kudos to Kit for attempting to get her family back on the same page.

    7. Lamentamini, I’ve always been a silent reader of your stories. This time, though, I couldn’t help but say something. This was hilarious to me! We could only hope that S4 would turn out like this!!! Great job and can’t wait for the next installment of this and Milestones.

    8. I’m glad people enjoyed this. I had to go back and fix some glaring typos and also to leave a comment of my own. When I read this all the way through just now, I realized how wrong it was for Max to throw ham at Jenny with her being Jewish and all. LMFAO

    9. O.o food fight..lol…when you mentioned Jerry I thought you’re going to have a “Who’s your daddy?” kind of theme lmao..I’m sure the ham incident will not be use against you in anyway:) This was fun. Thanks!

    10. “Rating Disabled By Author”? What!? Well, I’m gonna give you five stars anyway. * * * * * (Heh, way to beat the system, bum. Way to beat the system [pats herself on the back])

    12. Great story. You did a fantastic job at conveying the pain and loss Shane feels because of the incident in Canada. It was good to clear the air between Carmen and Shane, finally Carmen knows why Shane did what she did and they could move on from that mistake. (I’m a Sharmen fan, can you tell? LOL) I even liked some of the non-Sharmen lines and tidbits, like Bette and Tina’s thoughts as Kit said grace, or Kit admitting that she was throwing food too. Awesome dinner!

    13. lol…Lament where do you get this stuff from? Well written I must say and I hope it leads to a real conversation between Bette & Tina. That whole table had some issues (even Angelica…lol)

    14. Bringing up the rear here! Great story, as always, Lament! Yeah–I couldn’t believe that ham was thrown at Jenny, either! lol Loved the dialogue, which remained true to the characters. Love that Angelica for being such an accurate pitcher! Maybe she’ll play softball one day! Sorry I’m reading this so late–hope you decide to do a Christmas update!

    16. ohh, this was so hilarious.. Thanks for posting. LOL at Bette and Tina’s thoughts when Kit was saying grace, somehow they were still on the same page, in a weird way =))

    17. HahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahHHahhahahahhahahahahahhahahhhahhhhahahhahahahhahahahahaha that’s all I can do…sigh that was great, my kind of comedy

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