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    What If – Chapter 10 (A)

    Shane: Just jump in the shower, polish that pointy forehead of yours, and throw on one your loud ass outfits that give us all vertigo and let’s go!

    Alice: [taking offense to her comment] My pointy forehead isn’t shiny!

    Shane: It’s so shiny it can help guide ships through fog.

    Alice: [her response caused her to laugh out loud] This coming from someone who dresses like she’s been through a paper shredder.

    Shane: [ignoring her] Start getting dressed!

    Alice: I have to wash and condition my hair.

    Shane: Were to going to a cookout with friends not a video shoot for the Red Hot Chilli Peppers are you trying to look cute for Dana?

    Alice: Whatever.

    Shane: I don’t hear you moving!

    Alice: I know…it’s just going to take a minute I have a melted snicker bar in my hair.

    Shane: WTH? You know what never mind I don’t want to know——-no, yes I do what the hell!!?

    Alice: I sleep with my mouth opened.

    Shane: Gross.

    Alice: Hey!

    Shane: Look, start getting ready I’ll be there in 15 minutes if you don’t answer the door I’ll know you’re in the shower and I’ll use my key.

    Alice: Alright—–oh wait I forgot I told Bette and Tina I would bring drinks so we have to stop by the store.

    Shane: Yeah, okay fine just start getting ready.

    Alice: Okay, see ya in a few.

    Shane: Yup. [she says before hanging up the phone]

    Alice: [Scanning through her phone once more she hoped to receive at least a text from Tasha but there was nothing. Forcing herself out of bed she puts on Alanis Morissette Jagged Little Pill cd and hopes into the shower.]

    Bette & Tinas House…..

    Helena: [enjoying her taste testing duties] OMG, these spring rolls taste fantastic!

    Tina: Really, you like them?

    Helena: What is the secret ingredient?

    Tina: Wine.

    Helena: Ah, yes I should have known I cook with wine sometimes too I even add it to the food.

    Tina: [laughs out loud] Enough, about wine spill it why aren’t you speaking to Shane?

    Helena: Why aren’t you speaking to your wife?

    Tina: Fair enough, I’ll answer your question if you answer mine?

    Helena: [sticking out her pinky] Pinky swear?

    Tina: [hooking her pinky with hers] Pinky swear.

    Comments

    1. Jesus! There are so many, many funny lines in this story I can’t count them all!

      I’d pull a few out, but on their own they’re funny, but in the rapid flow of the conversations you’ve crafted they’re zingers.

      Blackbird

    2. Oh my God, why don’t you send Jenny for a trip to Hawaii, and release her without parachutes from the plane, on the crater of the active Kilauea volcano, she is getting on my nerve.
      Well, Alice has to re-evaluate her deeds and feelings and make a decision, Dana also has to talk to Lara, if they are going to keep hanging out, they should come clean with their partners.
      I think Tina and Bette have a lot to talk about Bette going to China.
      Very nice chapter by the way. Thanks

      P

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