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All The White Horses: Part Two (2/5)
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This couldn’t go on, Alice could see Dana going back to how she had
once been. How she was during the days she was closeted, that same
insecurity and quiet self hatred starting to build up inside of her
because of the perception she believed that others had. For years she
had fought to rid the athlete of those feelings, of that absurd belief
she wasn’t as good or as pretty or as smart as everyone else and Alice
would be damned if those thoughts were going to come back while Dana
was fighting against this fucking disease.
“Hey Dane?” Alice began in tones she hoped were casual. “Do you mind if
I called Shane and asked her to come over tonight? I have this idea and
I sort of need her help for it.”
Blinking her eyes slowly, Dana tilted her head back, doing her best to
recall what had been said to her. The only thing that stuck was their
friend’s name. “Shane?” she echoed dimly, her expression slightly fuzzy
from the almost sleep.
“Yeah, Shane,” said Alice, chuckling fondly and smoothing some hair
away from Dana’s forehead, smiling when Dana sighed at her touch and
closed her eyes. “You know how you were thinking of doing some stuff
for breast cancer awareness? When I was looking into the various
organizations for you I remembered about this group that’s sort of like
Locks of Love but they make hair pieces for everybody, not just kids
eighteen and younger. And I figured, I like having short hair!” Alice
shrugged, her voice squeaking a bit.
“You want Shane to cut your hair and give it away?” asked Dana, looking puzzled.
“Are you doubting my hair’s ability to be made into a wig?” questioned
Alice, managing to look believably hurt. “I’ll have you know my hair is
prime material for wiggery.”
“Wiggery? That’s so not a word, Al,” said Dana with a laugh, scrunching her nose up.
“Wiggery is a word!” Alice exclaimed huffily, poking Dana in the side
and grinning when the tennis player squealed and curled away from her
touch. “I looked it up in the official Scrabble dictionary once because
Helena doubted its validity when I kicked her ass with four triple word
scores. It means a wig or wigs, false hair, or any cover or screen, as
red tapism.”
“What the hell is red tapism?” Dana asked in dry tones.
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OK – I just read the first chapter and this one – dreiser – awesome. truly. funny, sweet, sad, hopeful and bittersweet. I’d expect nothing less from you though. Very well done!
That was beautiful. Awesome writing as usual. Great way to end that chapter. Looking forward to the next.
Absolute perfection. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again no doubt, but your writing is amazing. And I’m not just talking about the grammar, which is a big pet-peeve of mine, but I’m talking about the way you portray and characterize each character to form. You perfectly write and vocalize Alice and Dana (no doubt because of your love for the characters), but you also have a good sense for portraying all of the others. I know you love Helena, as do I, and I like how you are forming her as she’ll hopefully be portrayed in S3 (although I do like snarky Helena too!). I know where this story is heading, mainly from checking in at your journal for updates, and I’m still excited about it because of how it’s written. Anyway, long-winded I know, but I have to give accolades to your talent.
Awww i am soo inlove with this story! The way you write the characters is spot on! This chapter was just amazing! Please update soon
Thank you for this story. Yours are stories I can read over and over again and always love. Perfect.
Simply Awsome, I hope the actual season of Alice and Dana’s relationship is at least half as good as it is in your story, keep up the great work!!
That was great. Your writing is amazing. I love angst and there was enough to go around in this chapter. Their love confession was…beautiful. Great job.
I have read it more than one time and I found more and more things that I like in your story. I said before but danish has unbelieveble writers, thanks.
Hiya, I’m a silent lurker, BUT your stuff is great…the only other person here with as much talent to hold my attention is Ms.Layla_Gray, but you capture the couple like no one esle…keep it up and you have another fan here….Peace.
IC created the characters, but I am amazed by how well you “get” them. I’m sitting here at my desk feeling happy because Alice and Dana were able to admit their feelings for each other. At the same time there is a bittersweet feeling because there is a good chance that the overall ending of the story will not be happy. It’s sad that two people who were so well suited for each other and so in love had to waste so much time. But it makes for a great story for us. I will bide my time re-reading the first two parts until you post again. Thanks for another wonderful story.
I usually lurk, but I just had to comment. Beautiful. Your writing is simply beautiful. The character development, the story development, I feel more like a voyeur than a reader!! Thank you!
Amazing! I had butterflies in my stomach the entire time I read this story. You write Alice and Dana beautifully. I love Alice’s comments like, “you’re such a girl and yet so helpless about girly things” and Alice being so sweet with Dana while she was sick in the bathroom. Their thoughts and fears which you expressed, are things that Eileen and her writers failed to say in Season 2. I’ve always loved the playful and sarcastic aspect of their relationship- very well written. I can’t wait till your next update!
i had chills the entire time of reading this story. It was amazing the way you wrote about al and dane’s love and i so hope beyond hope that you write more. Please post soon
wow that was amazing! please post soon!
this is great I am just catching up so I hope that u have already post again