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All The White Horses: Part Two (2/5)
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“You think I’m gorgeous?” interrupted Dana, her eyes wide and her brain
fixated on the fact that Alice still found her attractive despite
everything she had been through. She knew she didn’t look her best,
hell, she knew she didn’t look anywhere close to it but if Alice
thought she looked good… gorgeous in fact, then as sad as it sounded,
that’s how Dana felt. “Really?”
“Really,” echoed Alice, her hand cupping the tennis player’s cheek as
she formed a tender smile. Then brown eyes went wide and she wore a
deer caught in headlights expression and said nervously, “I meant gorgeous
in a friendly way. Because we’re just friends and I know
that.”
As she said this, Alice started to pull away from Dana who frowned
instinctively at the loss of contact and she held onto the blonde who
was continuing to make her physical retreat. This resulted in Alice
hanging halfway off the couch and looking up at Dana with nervous but
disbelieving eyes that told the athlete quite plainly that the other
woman had no idea why Dana was still holding on. Why she wouldn’t
simply let go already and want to have Alice as far away from her as
physically possible. And seeing that made the tennis player just so
impossibly sad but angry at the same time and in a rare moment of total
conviction, Dana pulled Alice to her and wrapped her up in a close
embrace. Burying her face in dark blonde locks and once again breathing
in the chocolate scent the writer carried that she had never noticed.
“I want you here,” Dana whispered into Alice’s ear, pulling her even
closer yet. Their bodies were close enough that she didn’t think there
was any space between them but it still wasn’t close enough for her.
She doubted it ever would be. “Please stay, Al.”
Her heart caught in her throat and her eyes tearing up, Alice swallowed
hard and returned the embrace as she replied, her voice hoarse with
emotion, “For as long as you want.”
—
A few hours later, Alice was at KCRW preparing for her radio show and
Dana was opening the door to reveal a grinning Shane. “Hey Dane,” Shane
drawled, her voice a warm and comforting rumble as she walked inside.
Putting down the custom made leather case that held her hair styling
supplies, which was yet another example of an out of the blue sweet yet
logical present from Carmen, she drew Dana in for a hug. Then Shane
murmured in the tennis player’s ear with affectionate humor, “Check me
out. I’m not with Carmen and I haven’t broken into a cold sweat,
started shaking uncontrollably, or have any other withdrawal symptoms.”
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OK – I just read the first chapter and this one – dreiser – awesome. truly. funny, sweet, sad, hopeful and bittersweet. I’d expect nothing less from you though. Very well done!
That was beautiful. Awesome writing as usual. Great way to end that chapter. Looking forward to the next.
Absolute perfection. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again no doubt, but your writing is amazing. And I’m not just talking about the grammar, which is a big pet-peeve of mine, but I’m talking about the way you portray and characterize each character to form. You perfectly write and vocalize Alice and Dana (no doubt because of your love for the characters), but you also have a good sense for portraying all of the others. I know you love Helena, as do I, and I like how you are forming her as she’ll hopefully be portrayed in S3 (although I do like snarky Helena too!). I know where this story is heading, mainly from checking in at your journal for updates, and I’m still excited about it because of how it’s written. Anyway, long-winded I know, but I have to give accolades to your talent.
Awww i am soo inlove with this story! The way you write the characters is spot on! This chapter was just amazing! Please update soon
Thank you for this story. Yours are stories I can read over and over again and always love. Perfect.
Simply Awsome, I hope the actual season of Alice and Dana’s relationship is at least half as good as it is in your story, keep up the great work!!
That was great. Your writing is amazing. I love angst and there was enough to go around in this chapter. Their love confession was…beautiful. Great job.
I have read it more than one time and I found more and more things that I like in your story. I said before but danish has unbelieveble writers, thanks.
Hiya, I’m a silent lurker, BUT your stuff is great…the only other person here with as much talent to hold my attention is Ms.Layla_Gray, but you capture the couple like no one esle…keep it up and you have another fan here….Peace.
IC created the characters, but I am amazed by how well you “get” them. I’m sitting here at my desk feeling happy because Alice and Dana were able to admit their feelings for each other. At the same time there is a bittersweet feeling because there is a good chance that the overall ending of the story will not be happy. It’s sad that two people who were so well suited for each other and so in love had to waste so much time. But it makes for a great story for us. I will bide my time re-reading the first two parts until you post again. Thanks for another wonderful story.
I usually lurk, but I just had to comment. Beautiful. Your writing is simply beautiful. The character development, the story development, I feel more like a voyeur than a reader!! Thank you!
Amazing! I had butterflies in my stomach the entire time I read this story. You write Alice and Dana beautifully. I love Alice’s comments like, “you’re such a girl and yet so helpless about girly things” and Alice being so sweet with Dana while she was sick in the bathroom. Their thoughts and fears which you expressed, are things that Eileen and her writers failed to say in Season 2. I’ve always loved the playful and sarcastic aspect of their relationship- very well written. I can’t wait till your next update!
i had chills the entire time of reading this story. It was amazing the way you wrote about al and dane’s love and i so hope beyond hope that you write more. Please post soon
wow that was amazing! please post soon!
this is great I am just catching up so I hope that u have already post again